Breathe out anxiety. Breathe in calm.You’re a main character. They don’t eliminate main characters.
‘Hi, everyone,’ Dylan said.
‘You’ve got to call them Juliets,’ Steve said. ‘Go again.’
‘Hi Juliets,’ Dylan said. ‘I just wanted to tell you what an honour it was to meet you all. It’s really hard for me to believe that so many beautiful women came out here just to meet me, when the world is in this state. So thank you. So much. From the bottom of my heart.’
‘Unfortunately, there are fifteen of you,’ Z said. ‘Dylan onlyhas twelve necklaces to give out, which means, I’m sorry, but three of you are going to have to leave the Juliet Villa tonight.’
‘Good luck,’ Amanda whispered to me.
‘You too,’ I whispered back.
Dylan picked up the first necklace. He closed his eyes for a second, and his nostrils flared as he took in a deep breath. Maybe he’d been getting into Jenifer’s Yoga too.
‘Amanda,’ he said.
The smile that spread across Amanda’s face could have outshone the sun. ‘Oh my goodness,’ she said. ‘Oh my goodness!’
I had to shuffle back a little so she could get past me. ‘Thank you so much,’ she told Dylan. ‘I can’t believe this.’
‘It’s my pleasure,’ he said. ‘Amanda, I want to know if your heart is the other half of mine. Will you take this necklace and commit to finding out with me?’
‘I will,’ she said. ‘Of course.’
He fumbled trying to fasten the necklace around her neck. ‘This will take forever if I’m this bad at putting these on,’ he said. ‘Sorry, Amanda.’
‘You’re fine,’ she said, smiling up at him. ‘Take your time.’
They were so cute I wanted to vomit.
Dylan still did a pretty shit job of fastening the necklace, because a wardrobe person had to fix it as Amanda walked back up towards the rest of us. I shuffled back again so she could get past me. ‘Congratulations,’ I whispered.
‘Thanks,’ she replied.
‘Dylan,’ Dylan said. ‘The other Dylan, I mean. Dylan G. I’m not quite vain enough to try and declare my love to myself.’
The laugh was obligatory and weak as Hero Nurse Dylanwalked up to claim her necklace. I wasn’t the only one who was nervous.
I watched out of the corner of my eye as the smile faded from Amanda’s face. I guess she hadn’t been lying when she said she really was here for love.
The Necklace Ceremonies were so quick on TV. There was hardly ever even an ad break in them: they were just a few quick minutes at the end of the episode. Filming them, though, was a different story. As the hours stretched on, my back started to ache from standing in heels as they made people reshoot their acceptances again and again.
‘You’ve got to get the words right, Dylan,’ Steve said, wiping the back of his hand over his sweaty brow. ‘It’s will you “commit to finding out with me”, not will you “find out with me”.’
‘Sorry,’ Dylan said. ‘I practised this all last night. I don’t know why I keep fucking it up.’
‘Do you want us to write it on some cardboard behind the camera for you?’
‘No. I’ve got it. Sorry.’
I could feel my make-up starting to melt under the lights. I wasn’t the only one – we’d already had to stop three times for touch-ups. But I was somehow also freezing, my skin rising up in goosebumps. My mouth was dry and my stomach felt like it was a washing machine on the spin cycle.
I also needed to pee. Really badly.
And I still didn’t have a necklace.
‘Heather,’ Dylan said.
