I struggle with control and lose, her whimpers and moans as she unravels on my cock prove to be too much. “Fuck,” I grit out, thrusting deeper, holding it there, waiting as the pulsing between my legs erupts, and my orgasm slams into me. Her mouth opens in silent awe, and our eyes come together as my cock throbs. She holds my eyes, watching my every twitch and breath as I come into the condom inside of her, the feeling so unbelievably good that my eyes threaten to water.
Quinn strokes her palm up and down my bicep as I struggle to regain composure, my cock still twitching and throbbing inside her. I crush my mouth down on hers and sink my fingers into her soft blonde hair, giving this kiss everything I can to show her how amazing that was, how good she felt, how perfect it was.
When I pull back, her eyes are misty, and she brings her hand to my cheek, stroking her thumb along my bottom lip. “That was even better than I imagined.”
I shake my head. “You’re tellin’ me.” Slowly, I start to withdraw, but she places her hands on my shoulders. “Wait,” Quinn breathes, peering down between our sweaty bodies. “I want to see.”
I don’t understand, so I shake my head. “See what?"
“I want to see you pull out of me, and I want to see your cum in the condom,” she says, still peering between us. Something about that admission stirs up my insides a little, and I kiss her again.
“What was that for?” she asks, splitting her focus between my eyes and my cock still inside of her.
“Because you’re unlike anyone I’ve met, and you make me so happy,” I admit, surprised by the words that come so freely but then again, when we were making love, we both agreed that we want to be together. This shouldn’t mean half as much, but because we’re not mid-fuck, we both know that it does.
“Landry,” she breathes, her voice soft and rattled from my admission.
I nod my head. “Okay, keep your eyes on the prize, baby.” Carefully, I reroute the heavy emotional moment to my dick, where I slowly start withdrawing. She whines as I hollow her and I find myself reassuring her that there will be more, whenever she says the word.
“I know, baby, but whenever you want me, I’m yours.” I kiss her lips, then pull out of her the rest of the way. She reaches down, finding my cock with her palm. She holds the end of the condom, and runs her finger over my cum held by the warm, sticky latex. Her eyes shine as she peers at it. “I’ve swallowed that,” she says pridefully, then looks up at me, her green eyes stealing my breath for a second. “One day, that’s gonna be inside me, and not in a condom.”
That’s as close as we come to revisiting what we said during sex. After some raucous making out and a joint clean up session in my bathroom, Quinn falls asleep in my bed.
I’d hoped she would.
CHAPTER 26
IT’S NOT REAL, IT’S PMS
“My goodness,that looks hard on the spine,” Mom says after watching the small trailer I assembled after Landry’s exhibition ride the other day. The rodeo is nearing, and our time together is quickly coming to a close. I’ve been busying myself with extra editing, and trying not to think about how Landry hasn’t brought up what we said in the throes of passion the other night.
“It is,” I agree. “I met some old riders who said they pretty much can’t even work on a ranch anymore because of all of their time in the rodeo. It’s a sport that requires loyalty.”
Mom nods. “Loving anything that intensely requires loyalty.”
I chew the inside of my mouth and ask my mom about work, her bridge club, and how knitting is going.Lane comes on camera long enough to share the raspberry she acquired in her first week on the volleyball team, and before I know it, Mom has to go.
“Wait,” I hedge, my eyes nervously darting to the notes I took during my meeting with Devin and his assistant this morning. The meeting was impromptu but necessary after they screened my trailer. Devin loves the intimacy of the documentary, and hearing that made me feel awful.
“I slept with Landry a few days ago, and it was really nice, Mom. I feel like I could be here, and live my life here, and find a new version of myself here, too.”
My mom smiles. “You finally admitted it to yourself.”
I shake my head, tears stinging my eyes. “Devin loves the documentary so far. And if Landry and I really just go through with this fake marriage and get it annulled after and I move on, Devin will be right. I will have married this man just to further my career. And then who am I? I’m just… no better than him. I’m a user. I’m gross. I’m awful,” I balk, my emotions spiraling out of control out of nowhere.
I guess notnowhere.
Falling in love with a man who comes with a second heart and mind to be conscientious of is beautiful and complicated, and it makes sense that as the end of the documentary approaches emotions get the best of me.
“Now what?” I ask, but she just laughs, shaking out her soft bob.
“That’s not up to me, honey. But if you’re asking permission to stay, you know you don’t need it. All I’ve ever wanted was for my girls to be happy. If that means leaving California for a ranch in Texas, because that’s where you’re happiest, I support that, Quinn. You know I do.”
My eyes burn with just the thought. I’d hate to not see my mom and Laney every day, but the idea of not watching Sadiehave her seventh birthday, or see Landry turn this ranch around, it makes me sick.
“Is it possible to belong in two places at once?” I ask, my bottom lip wobbly.
Mom smiles, familiar and sad, the smile she gives when we both know the answer but neither wants to say.
