I stroke my fingers through her hair. “My dick isn’t going anywhere. Get some sleep. You deserve it.” She deserves so much more, and I’m trying to figure out how to make it all happen.
CHAPTER 30
IT’S THAT TIME
“Oh golly,”Quinn sighs, “I don’t think I’ve got a fourth story in me tonight.” She turns to me, questioning, all that’s missing is her bushy tail.
“No.” I shake my head, and drag my hand across my throat. “Don’t you dare con Miss Quinn and take advantage of her good story-reading nature, Sadie Ruth.”
She kicks her feet under the covers, sending them rippling as she laughs wildly. Quinn smirks and grabs her ankle over the comforter. “You tricked me!”
Sadie laughs, but eventually sits up and takes her around the neck, her little hands getting lost in Quinn’s golden hair. They share words, hushed and deliberately private, and hug for a moment longer. And I ache to see this on a daily basis.
When Quinn gets up, I get to my knee and give Sadie akiss, and a very long hug. We exchange I love yous, and she doesn’t say a word about Miss Quinn going down the hall toward my room when she leaves.
Quietly we head downstairs and find ourselves sinking into the porch swing, watching the stars through the sheeting. She rests her head on my chest, and I stroke my hand over her head, and the world feels right.
“Quinn,” I broach, and just saying her name makes me vibrate. She reaches for my hand and her touch fills me with desire. It’s wild and exciting to know I still have life in me, that I’m more than hardened grief and softened acceptance. I thought the best for me was dulling all the sharp pains inside me just to survive, that surviving successfully was the best goal I could ever aim for.
With her around, I see that things are possible and life can be good again. That I’m a man of a pair, meant to be part of a team, and I know now for sure I don’t want to be alone.
I need Quinn, and I want her to stay.
And we haven’t had even a free second to talk lately, what with exhibition and training rides, bullshit with the Montgomerys, impromptu ice cream parties, and everything else. But we need to talk. Time is closing in on us, and I feel the suffocation of it coming. I planned on talking to her earlier, but we were tugged out into another ice cream party which inevitably resulted in a Slip ’N Slide party which then turned into handmade pizzas by the fire and late-night kid rides on Daisy.
Quinn’s been with Sadie all day, never asking for a break, never begging off. And the other night, we were simply too exhausted to make love or talk.
She strokes her fingers down my forearm, lazily tracing my tattoos as I use one foot to keep the swing swaying. Cicadas sing, and the porch creaks, and Quinn sighs as shegets to the pinup tattoo, her absolute favorite. Through the open window above us, I can barely hear Sadie’s sound machine, lulling her into a sleep full of dreams and sweet nothings.
This is the most perfect life, right here and now.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Quinn asks, touching the side of my neck, then my cheek. She loves touching me and I love being casually adored by her. It makes me feel better than winning any rodeo could.
I look down at her draped on my chest, her legs intertwined with mine, green eyes sparkling.
I smile. “I’m in love with you, Quinn.”
Her eyes widen and she lifts off of me, pushing back to put a little space between us. “What?”
She’s so beautiful, and I swear she looks like the definition of love here on my porch in the moonlight. “I love you, and I want you to stay. And I want to be with you, for real, forever.”
My heart is racing, despite the fact that I feel pretty calm. I’ve come to terms with how I feel about Quinn, and what it will mean if I do this and she says no. Nothing would change. Our agreement is to annul shortly after the rodeo, and if she says she doesn’t love me right here and now, well, the outcome is the same and at least I will have taken my damn shot. For me and my girl.
“Landry, I love you, too,” she says as relief hollows my chest, emptying the tension and stress with just those words.
“Yeah?” I rub the back of my neck as heat crawls into my ears. “Really?”
She lunges, landing against my chest, and my arms wrap around her, my lips finding hers. “Yes, of course I love you, dummy.” She giggles, pressing kisses on the corner of mymouth, against my lips, and all over my cheeks as the swing sways wildly. “And of course I want to stay.”
I bury my head in the crook of her neck, losing myself in the vanilla and familiarity of her hair and perfume, feeling my eyes sting. “I love you,” I repeat, wanting to say it again, for all the times I felt it but denied it. “I love you so much.”
She stays in my arms, her words trapped between us. “You and Sadie gave me a home here, a home I didn’t know I was looking for, one I didn’t know I needed. But I do. I need Sable Sky, I need Vaughn Ranch, and I need the two of you.”
Quinn tugs my T-shirt down around the collar, pressing her lips to my bare chest as I sift my fingers through her hair, pulling it back, away from her face. “I’m so glad to hear you say that,” I admit as my eyes fall closed, her mouth carving a trail of adoration and ownership up my neck and along my ear.
She reaches between us, going to my pants, and I grab her wrist. “The condoms are upstairs.”
Our eyes lock. There’s still so much we have to discuss. Being in love is just the beginning. But she’s said she wants to be here, that she doesn't want to leave. Quinn kisses me, our faces but an inch from one another’s when she whispers, “I know. I don’t care.”
