We’re in her office at Northland—my new school.
Aka the place housing my now-ex-boyfriend (Jake, who broke up with me a hot minute after I punched his ex) and about fifteen hundred kids I don’t know because I grew up across town before we moved in with my sister.My time in public school—elementary or middle—wasn’t with a single person at Northland.
All this, plus the woman holding my softball dreams in the palm of her manicured hand, because of course my parents couldn’t pay for me to stay at Windsor Prep.
In fact, even if they could have, they wouldn’t have, because they were so pissed at me for getting in a fight. In front of everybody. Over something that they think had to have been stupid mean-girl stuff.
I still haven’t told anyone what Stacey said, and I probably never will. The point is that I lost control. Even though I was in the right, how I handled it was so, so wrong.
And now, because I’m the luckiest girl in the world, my sister’s house sits just inside the boundary for Northland. Two blocks over and I’d be enrolling as a junior at Central. They have a horrible softball team there, but at least I’d get to be a star. Here, I may not even get to play.
Not if Coach Kitt’s face is any indication.
She actually hasn’t said anything to me yet, and it’s been five minutes since I walked into her office this afternoon—with less than a week to go before my first day of school. And so I glance at the personal photos over her toned shoulder—snapshots that include a husband and what looks to be a boy in a Northland letter jacket.
When I can’t take the silence anymore, I start to talk again, even though I’ve already said varying versions of:I’m sorry. I apologize. I want to be on your team this year. I canadd value. I can be a good teammate. I promise I won’t send another Tiger to see a plastic surgeon.
What I don’t say and won’t say:I need to be on your team to make sure I get a college scholarship.
I clear my throat. “Coach, if you need a reference, I’d be happy to put you in touch with my club coach, or Chad with the Junior Olympic te—”
Coach Kitt holds up a hand. “Olive, I believe you’re not only genuine in your remorse but that you’re a genuinely talented player. My team would benefit from having you.”
I take what feels like my first breath since I stepped into her office.
Junior year iscrucialfor a would-be college softball player. Senior year is a wash—all the scholarships have already been awarded and accepted before seniors even step on the field. Meaning that even with the attention I’ve already gotten, I can’t fade away or my future will, too. And just like a Windsor Prep education, college isn’t possible without a scholarship.
“Now, though you have impressive talents and are possibly the best third baseman I’ve personally seen play in Kansas City—”
“Thank you.”
She doesn’t even acknowledge the fact that I spoke. “—a successful team is made up of more than just talented players. A successful team is a careful balance of talent, drive, personality, and unity.”
I nod because I know all of this. If a team doesn’t mesh well, it can suffer, no matter how good the players are.
“And, honestly, at this juncture, my opinion is that you’re not a good fit for my team.”
“I—”
“Thatopinionmay change by tryouts in February. But that’s not a guarantee. I have to do what’s best for my team. We were third place at state last season.” This is a fact I know well, becauseweplaced second, losing in the title game, with my suspended ass riding the bench.
“And I only lost one senior,” she continues. One senior—Stacey. Gone to Arizona State. Good freaking riddance. “The group of girls we have this year is a terrific balance of talent and teamwork, and I want to nurture that, not upset it.”
I swallow again. “And you think I might upset it.”
“Yes.”
“What can I do to—”
“To make me think otherwise?” She says it with a perfectly arched brow, red lips pursed at the question mark.
I nod.
“Show me you can be a teammate.”
I’m not sure how I can demonstrate to her my stellar teammate chops without a team to be on.
To my surprise, Coach Kitt picks up on my confusion and helps me out. “Are you going out for any fall sports?”
