That reminds me of the other thing I can’t muster words for: Yannec. Did they even speak anymore? Does she even know he’s dead?
I . . . I don’t think I can break it to her. Not tonight, at least. “I have a question,” Ragne says suddenly. I feel her tail lashing against my back. That’s odd. Ragne may be an open book, but this is the first time
we’ve flipped tonervous. “Yes?” I prompt.
“What do I do if I like a human person?”
Joniza and I trade wide-eyed looks. I open my mouth and she
immediately claps a hand over it. “Absolutely not. I wouldn’t let you give relationship advice to my archnemesis.” “You haf an arfhnemefif?” I garble through her fingers.
She lets me go. “I do. Keeps trying to upstage me every time we play the same venue. I hate him. Also: illegally handsome.Anyway.Ragne, do you like this person as a friend, or is it different? How do they make you feel?”
Ragne wiggles on my shoulder. “Floaty? And warm. And like I want to laugh a lot. And like I want to put my mouth on—”
“Right, yes, understood. You’ve got it bad.” Joniza laughs softly. “Well, humans are . . .”
“Complicated?” Ragne suggests.
Joniza and I both laugh at that, and it’s almost a relief. “Yes,” Joniza says. “So sometimes your feelings can make them uncomfortable, if they don’t feel the same. But not always. And sometimes they do feel the same.” She cracks a grin. “And then you can put your mouth wherever they want you to.”
“Ew,” I mutter.
“You say that like I didn’t catch you kissing your pillow and pretending it was Sebalt the stable boy.”
I bury my face in my hands. “Howdareyou.”
“How do I know if someone feels the same way I do?” Ragne chirps. I am, for once, grateful for her one-track mind. I think Joniza may be thawing, but I am so, so afraid of spoiling it.
“That’s also complicated.” Joniza purses her lips. “Here’s the secret with humans, Ragne. There’s a lot of really, really bad ones. And a lot more who aren’t really goodorbad. But sometimes you find people who prove they’re worthy of you, who prove they deserve your trust. And you can always tell people like that how you feel. You should, if you want to keep them around.”
“Subtle,” I say under my breath. Joniza lightly slugs me in the arm.
And just like that, there’s a knot in my throat.
“I really missed you.” The words spill out, splintering a little, and I can’t stop the tide. “I thought you’d move on and I’d be fine with it, but I missed you so much, I’m sorry I made you worry, I’m sorry I pushed you away, I’m—”
Joniza wraps me in a fierce hug, and there is nothing more I can say.
It’s the first time I’ve been held like this in . . . I don’t know how long. At least a year. Maybe longer.
“Fine, fine,” she says after we’ve both dried our faces. “Apology accepted. I promised you a way to sneak Gisele in. It isn’t a ball without music, right? So the first step is getting me into your rotation . . .”
`
“A-r-d-î-m,” I spell out to Franziska the next morning as I march up the stairs to Adalbrecht’s wing, “with the accent on thei, you know, one of those fun little hats. I’d like her to play after the marriage contract is signed but before it getstoolate.”
“Yes, m’lady,” the chief steward says, jotting a note on her slate. Then she blanches as she sees my destination. “Oh,Prinzessin, the margrave wanted a private—”
“What’s that?” I ask innocently, then throw open the door of Adalbrecht’s parlor.
“. . . don’t see why you had topois—” Count von Hirsching is saying before he cuts himself off. He and Adalbrecht are alone with their breakfast, not even an attendant on hand to clear the plates. “Position . . . the . . . floral arrangements,” the count falters, “like . . . that.”
Interesting. Can’t say it’s a shock the von Hirschings are in the mix; I file that away to tell Emeric. (Maybe for a price. Waste not, want not.)
Adalbrecht, for his part, started choking on his coffee the moment I blew through the door.
“Oh, darling, I feelsomuch better,” I trill. It’s only half a lie. Physically, I still feel like I’ve been run over by a wagon. Emotionally . . . Well, the horror Adalbrecht’s trying to stifle right now is adding years to my life. “I slept so well! What was that medicine? Why, I could drink a whole bottle.”
