“Yes, you do die,” said Da. “Not at once, but you do. Dav killed himself, Foss. While you were away.”
I blinked.
“They all do,” said Da. “At least, that’s what the stories say. They wander for a while, and weep, and then they wind down like a clock and put themselves out of their misery. Whole villages of ghosts. That’s what the stories say.”
I felt fear clog my throat like a dose of medicine. “How?” I asked.
Da’s eyes shifted. “That’s not ...”
“It is important, Da. How?”
Reluctantly, Da met my eyes. “He cut his throat,” he said. “That’s how they always did it. In the stories. Either that, or they drowned themselves or hanged themselves. Stabbing themselves in the heart doesn’t work, you see. Something about the magic.”
My head swam.
“Is that going to happen to you, my girl?” he asked. Da was a fine figure of a man, in rude health, with a ruddy face that matched his meats, but in that moment, he looked drawn and pale.
“No, Da,” I said with a confidence that I did not feel. “We’re going to find this person who can repair hearts, whoever it is, and they’ll fix me right up. I promise.”
He knew that I couldn’t possibly know that, of course, but I think it comforted him anyway. He drew me in for a hug, and I felt his tears wet against my ear and cheek.
“I couldn’t bear to lose you,” he said.
“You won’t, Da,” I managed. “And I’m not alone. Sylvester and Cornelius will be with me.”
“I like him,” he said in my ear. “Your young man.”
I pulled back. “He’s notmy young man,” I insisted, flushing.
“Could have fooled me,” teased Da, but, like I’ve said, he thought the sun shone out of my arse, and that I was as beautiful to everyone else in the world as I was to him.
“For being a sorcerer, he’s not a bad chap,” said Da.
“I’m under his spell, Da. He might not have meant it, but I am. That means that I’m in love with him, all right? And I can’t help it. Like Dav and his sorceress.”
“Foss ...”
“I’m just like Dav.” I was working myself up now. “Just another fool tagging along after a beautiful face, to be thrown away like yesterday’s dinner, not even fit for the cat.”
“I don’t think he sees you that way,” argued Da. “And besides, it’s not true. You’ve done a lot for him, it sounds like. Just ... put yourself first, all right? As best you can. Even if he’s a decent fellow, as he seems, he can’t hold a candle to my Foss. And I need you to come home safe.”
“I will, Da,” I promised. But I know neither of us believed me.
I wished we could stay there just for the night—that I could collapse into my comfortable old trundle bed, with the indentation in the mattress just the right size and shape for me. I wished that Cornelius could curl up on the old blanket my mother had crocheted before I was born, that stayed always folded at the foot of the bed. I determinedly refused to imagine where Sylvester would sleep.
There was no time, however.
Da promised to gather the village together in the morning and tell them about the coming harvest, and to send riders to the neighboring villages to start to spread the word. We hoped each settlement would send out riders of its own, and thus word would spread swiftly, giving many enough time to hide.
It wouldn’t keep them safe from the sorceresses and the king for long, but it might keep them safe long enough for us to return with a way to repair the hearts. If such a cure actually existed, of course, which was still by no means certain.
Da pressed a final cup of tea upon us both, as if fortifying us for the journey, and by the time the very first graying of dawn had lightened the night sky, we were back in the carriage and on our way to the border.
Saying goodbye to Da—well, there’s no way to describe it. We were both putting on a brave face, but I could barely speak past the lump in my throat, and I could see the tears glistening in Da’s eyes.
Sylvester wandered away to give us the chance to bid a proper farewell, and we clung to each other for a long time. Neither of us voiced the fact that this might be the last time we saw each other, but we both knew it.
When Da finally released me, his face was wet. He attempted a smile. “I love you, my girl,” he said.
