Jack didn’t repeat whatever had made him blush. Instead, he said, “She says you need to run your fingers over the whole doorframe. Don’t miss an inch.”
“I didn’t see Auntie Zee do that.”
A brief pause, and then Jack reported, “She was closing a portal that she’d opened herself; your mom says that’s different. She also wants to know if you’ve been happy and if you’re eating enough.”
Calisa laughed, slightly hysterically. “Please tell her to remember what I said about an unhappy sea witch. I really don’t want to be responsible for flooding the bed-and-breakfast.”
He relayed that. “She says you want the door to know you, to recognize you. It would help if you whispered to it? Auntie Zee used to have her spend days in doorways, learning how it felt to be in a liminal space.” Into the phone, he said, “I don’t know that we have days.”
Calisa hoped he didn’t over-worry them. They were expertsat over-worrying. On the other hand, the situation was a bit on the dire side. Or at least the wet side.
“As you’re touching the doorframe,” Jack parroted, “focus on what it means to cross a threshold. To change. To transform. To grow.”
That was…rather mushy. And vague.
“She says she never really understood it either. But Auntie Zee was insistent that portal openings were about being open to change, to new experiences, to new emotions.”
“Well, I’m feeling brand-new anxiety and fear, does that count?”
Jack relayed that. “That’s not precisely what she had in mind. I think it has to be a positive emotion?” He paused, listening, and then said, “She said that to unlock your potential, you have to experience a fundamental positive change while in the doorway. You need to experience an epiphany.”
“Seriously? How am I supposed to do that?”
He asked the question and then reported, “She says she can’t tell you. It’s different for everyone, and it has to be true and honest. You need to unlock yourself before you can unlock a gateway to a realm. Especially the first time. You’ve got to free your power.”
She glared at the phone, as if Mom-Kate could feel her glare across the miles. “Tell her that this is not at all like Luke Skywalker’s training.”
He relayed that. “She said it kind of is. ‘You will find only what you bring in.’ ”
Calisa snorted. “Anything else?”
He asked and then shook his head. “She said that’s the first step. You need to master this before you can proceed. Unlock yourself, and you’ll unlock the magic within you. After that you’ll be able to command the portal to open. Theoretically. She says she never got past the first step, she says she believes in you, and she’s proud of you no matter what.” He paused, listening. “Um, she says she loves you to Pluto and back?”
“Okay, tell her thank you and I love her and I’m going totry.”
He repeated that, then said, “She said, ‘Do or do not; there is no try.’ ” He hung up the phone and then came to stand byher.
Calisa took a deep breath and then another. It was possible she couldn’t do what Auntie Zee could. Her mother couldn’t. But she could try. “That’s bullshit advice. There’s always try.”
“I think it’s supposed to be motivational. Like, it means believe in yourself?”
I do believe.She’d seen incredible things from the moment she’d arrived. She’d walked into other realms! She’d talked with magical beings! She’d served them cake! It was entirely possible this would work. After all, she was descended from Auntie Zee, as she’d told Rin; she could have inherited the “ability.”
Inch by inch, she ran her fingers along the doorframe. She concentrated, digging deep, looking for the kind of revelatory bolt of self-confidence that would let her do something magical, a positive epiphany—she needed to believe that she could do something unique, needed, and wonderful.
A voice whispered inside her,What makes you special?
I’m Auntie Zee’s grandniece,she answered.
So? What makes you think that matters? Your mothercouldn’t open portals, and she grew up here.Mom-Kate had seen magic throughout her childhood and still couldn’t make it manifest in herself.
What kind of epiphany would unlock her power, if she hadany?
Did she have to want it badly enough? Was that the key?I do want it!She wanted to help the bed-and-breakfast. She wanted it to succeed and last.
Why?
Why. That was an excellent question. She’d only known that magic existed for a few weeks. As for the guests, they weren’t family or friends. Not yet. She liked them. She wanted Melidor to be able to raise her seedlings, knowing she could always return to visit. And Mulligan and Zef—she wanted them to be happy. She wanted Auntie Zee to come back.
