I smiled even though I didn’t feel it. “He was. I don’t even remember his name.”
“I think it was Taylor. Tyler?”
“Yeah.” I sniffled, curling in more. “You don’t need to be here right now.”
“I know.” She was quiet for a moment, letting out a slow breath. “Your brothers called me. Well, more like Austin came over and told me everything. I . . . Avery, you never told me about Kevin.”
“We had other things happening.”
“But he hurt you.”
“He did.”
“You never told me.”
“I didn’t.”
“I didn’t know he’d done that. And I gave you hell for leaving him.”
“Would you have cared?”
Her breath was shaky. “I don’t know. I would like to think I would have. I would like to think I would have been a good mom to you. But on top of losing your dad, I don’t think I would have been. I haven’t been.”
“Mom, I don’t know if I have the strength to fight right now. I’m too sad.”
“I’m not here to fight. I’m here to tell you I’m sorry. I . . . I started therapy. I have a lot to work on. I don’t know how longit’s going to take me, but I’m going to try.” She took a deliberate breath, her words barely above a whisper. “Avery, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, honey.”
I didn’t tell her it was okay. I didn’t say I was sorry. But for once, she didn’t prod for me to do either.
“I really loved him,” I whispered. “Mateo and I really loved him. I wanted to go all the way with both of them. I wanted to be with them forever. And Mateo and I still have each other. We always will. But I’m so fucking sad that Levi left. I knew he was going to leave, but . . .”
“You hoped he would stay.”
“Yeah, I really did.” Tears burned against my skin. “I just want to be held right now.”
“Can I hold you?”
I nodded. She leaned back on the bed next to me and put her arms around me.
A sob loosed in my chest as it hit me.
Sometimes a girl just really needed her mom.
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
Levi
Non-stop meetings.
Over the last week, from the moment I touched down in Minneapolis, I was in meetings. Meetings with PR. With my agent. With my coaches. With teammates. Everyone and god wanted to know what the hell I was thinking with my stunt, but they were glad I was back.
I felt sick.
Robin slid into the backseat next to me and let out a breath. She looked like she’d aged five years, and that was probably my fault.
“Let’s go get dinner,” she said.
“I’m tired.”
