“No.” She buttoned his shirt. “A little. I mean, I haven’t been with a man in a long time.”
He finished dressing himself. “There’s no hurry.”
She stared at her hands in her lap. “I’m confused as well. All these emotions, after years of not feeling anything but anger and fear, are frightening.”
“Cora.” He kissed her hands. “You think too much. Forgive yourself so you can move on.”
She smiled. “On a rational level, I’m fully aware only Jacob is to blame. On an emotional one, I’m quite agitated.”
“Time is the best doctor.” And love, and he’d give her all the love he could. He released her hands. “I’ll ask Lady Kingsley to see you when her absence won’t be noticed. Is there anything you need? I have to attend to my guests and keep an eye on David and Harry.”
Her smile didn’t reach her eyes. “Don’t worry about me. I’m well. I have my books and magazines to keep me amused. Go. Take care of your guests. I’ll see you later.”
He kissed her hand again. He couldn’t stop himself. “Stay strong.”
She gripped his fingers hard before letting his hand go. “Thank you.”
“You don’t have to thank me.”
A weight settled on his chest after he left her room. Hopefully, after Cora talked with Lady Kingsley, she would be less worried. And so would he.
Ethan’sfacial muscles would remain frozen in the shape of a polite smile after he’d greeted all his guests for the charity ball.
There was no way out of the endless ‘welcome’ and ‘thank you’ and ‘it’s lovely to see you here.’ He had to personally shake hands, bow, and smile at each of his guests if he wanted to keep their support flowing. Many of them didn’t give a damn about scarred soldiers. They wanted to show off their supposed good hearts with a generous donation they would gloat about in fancy sitting rooms. But on the other hand, he didn’t give a damn about their motivations. As long as they provided money and support for the centre, he was happy. At the very least, those who didn’t contribute financially didn’t complain about the centre either.
The downside was he couldn’t trust some of them when it came to Cora’s secret. A few of these civilised people would jump to his throat at the opportunity to use her to destroy him. He hated that Cora might be used as a weapon in someone else’s scheme.
He stiffened when Mrs. Sterling entered the room. Since the charity ball was somewhat informal, he’d invited her but never expected her to be here. She wore her mourning weeds as usual although she could wear violet and blue at this stage of the mourning. The black veil covering her face couldn’t contain the rage underneath it. He wasn’t surprised. He’d kept sending her money.
He bowed. “Madam. Thank you for being here.”
“My lord, I told you I don’t want your money,” she hissed.
“And I told you it was James’s wish.” And he would honour it despite the fact James hadn’t been a model soldier.
“You’ll take the money back, my lord, and that will be the end of this ridiculous charade.” She jutted out her chin.
He worked his jaw, fighting to keep his voice down. “Your pride won’t help you pay the bills.”
She gasped, and the veil couldn’t hide her hardened expression. “That’s none of your business,” she hissed. “I’d rather starve than accept money from the man who caused my husband’s death.”
Enough. “That’s not—” He bit his tongue to stop the truth from coming out. She would despise him further and refuse his help again. “War is complicated,” he said in a calmer tone.
“So is being a widow.” She spun on her heels in a flutter of black velvet and stormed out of the hall.
Stubborn, proud woman. He fixed his cravat and waited for the next guest. Not many people had noticed the argument with Mrs. Sterling, but the scene hadn’t been in his favour.
His smile was genuine when he bowed to the Lady Kingsley because, despite the fact she hadn’t defended him the night of the auction, she was sympathetic to the Royal Veterans’ Society’s cause. “My lady. It’s a pleasure to see you here.”
The old woman offered a bow of her head. “Dear Lord Stark, thank you for your invitation.”
He held her hand for a kiss. “Thank you for coming.”
She stared at him with confusion as if he’d asked a tricky question she didn’t know how to answer. “After the horrible scene at the museum, I couldn’t refuse your invitation.” She opened and closed her fan. “I shouldn’t have let Lord Roxbury convince me it was a good idea to let you go that night. I regret the manner with which I behaved.”
“All water under the bridge.” Especially since he needed the lady’s help. “Lord Roxbury can be very persuasive when he wants to.”
“Indeed. I wanted to have a word with him, but he seemed indisposed, and Lady Roxbury isn’t in London.” Her grey eyebrows drew together. “I wonder why the sudden departure, especially since her husband isn’t well. Shouldn’t she stay next to him? Anyway, your cause is a noble one. I believe we shall raise enough funds to keep the centre active for the whole year.”
