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“Chocolate with fudge,” Carys said around a mouthful of it. “Plus more fudge. And caramel.”
Her friend made grabby hands for the container. When she took it from Carys, she peered inside and frowned. “It’s almost gone.”
Carys shrugged. “I’m using it for medicinal purposes.”
Jordana offered it to Nova, who declined with an emphatic toss of her blue-and-black hair. “Ordinarily, I’d be all over that. Right now, just the smell of it is enough for me, thanks.”
After Jordana took a big spoonful, she passed the pint back to Carys. “You’re not out with Rune tonight.”
“Nope. I’m not.” Carys stared into the container. “We had an argument today. I think I broke up with him.”
“What?” Jordana stared at her, confused and aghast. “No wonder you’re medicating with double fudge and caramel. What happened?”
“The thing everyone warned me about—that I was being a fool letting myself get tangled up with him. That I was going to get hurt.”
Jordana frowned. “This morning everything seemed fined between you two. What did he do, Car? Wait a minute. Does this have something to do with the club? You didn’t know he wanted to buy it, did you?”
Carys shook her head. “It’s not about the club itself. It’s the fact that he won’t let me into his life. Not all of it, anyway.” She looked around Jordana to include Nova in the conversation. “I’ve been seeing this guy for a while now. A Breed fighter in one of the cage arenas in the city. Of course, my family doesn’t approve.”
“Those are dangerous places,” Nova remarked. “A lot of dangerous people there.”
“Rune’s not one of them,” Carys said, feeling the need to defend him. A little. “I mean, he’s definitely dangerous, but only in the cage. Outside of it, with me, he is . . . amazing. He’s tender and kind and exciting. We’ve been practically inseparable these past several weeks. I’ve never felt more wanted, more alive, than when I’m with him.”
Nova listened, a smile at the edges of her mouth. “Doesn’t sound like a problem to me so far.”
No, it didn’t to Carys either. But that was part of the problem. “Everything is great between us, except he’s holding back. He’s been keeping me at arm’s length and I never saw that until today. I fell so fast and so deep for him, maybe I didn’t want to let myself see it.”
“It sounds like he cares about you,” Nova pointed out.
Carys nodded, but it was a weak effort. “I want to believe he does, but there’s a steep wall between us and I can’t reach him. I can’t help feeling that if I try to scale it, he might be the one waiting to push me off once I reach the top.”
Jordana reached over and squeezed her hand. There was a gentle understanding in her best friend’s eyes. “Everyone’s afraid of what’s waiting at the bottom of the fall, Car. Someone once told me that the safest path isn’t necessarily the best one. That sometimes you have to be willing to leap into the unknown. Into the storm.”
Carys recalled that conversation she’d had with Jordana. It had been only a couple of weeks ago, when Jordana was having doubts about risking her heart on Nathan.
“Do you love this male?” Nova asked.
“Yes.” The truth jumped easily to her tongue, in spite of her misgivings about where things were heading with Rune. But she couldn’t deny what she felt for him. Not to her best friend, nor to the new friend she felt she had in Nova. “I love him with all my heart.”
“Then you have no choice but to try to reach him.”
Carys nodded, less certain now. She knew Nova’s advice was sound, but the sting from her argument with Rune was still fresh. So was the fear. If she gave him any more of her heart and he broke it, would she ever be able to piece it back together again?
She wasn’t sure she was ready to take that chance.
“Is this how it was with you and Mathias?” she asked Nova.
The tough-looking Breedmate held Carys in a tender, vulnerable gaze. “Yeah, it was like this for us too. But I was the one surrounded by high walls. Mathias showed me that the only thing strong enough to tear them down was love. I’m grateful every day that he was stubborn enough not to give up.”
CHAPTER 16
For the third time in the past hour, Carys went back to her exhibit design diagram and reversed the placements of a pair of John Singer Sargent paintings. She drew back from the virtual reality monitor to see how the change would look from the exhibit room floor.
Yes, that works better. Or not.
Dammit, maybe their placements had been right the first time . . .
She moved them back with a huffed sigh. Normally, she wasn’t so indecisive, but too many things on her mind had made it difficult to focus on her work at the museum.
