“Feels like it’s always Fox’s day,” Maria said with an affectionate eye roll.
“Aye, as it should be.” Fox puffed his chest. Were Maria and Fox together? “I’ve been thinking ’bout my other,” he said. “More than usual, the sneaky bastard. I was down in the Christmas market on Sunday, minding my own business. Can’t get enough of that German wine, don’t ken the name.”
“Glühwein,” Maria supplied, laying a hand on Fox’s bouncing leg. At least sleeping together, Landon figured.
“That’s the stuff.” Fox covered Maria’s hand with his, and Landon noticed another bright white scar drawing a line fromhis ring finger to his wrist. “I was drinking the German wine and didn’t notice how crowded the place was getting, tourists everywhere, ya ken? I’d stopped to look at this woman’s stall to see if maybe Maria would like what she was hawking—these glass coasters with pressed flowers and berries. I know they sound shite, but she likes shite stuff like that.” Maria swatted at him like a fly. “Then all of a sudden,bam!” Fox raised both hands over his head and yelled loud enough that Landon jumped. “The place was just crawling with people. Fucking everywhere, like locusts, all around me. And it was the weirdest thing. I wasn’t scared, but my body was. It was fucking frozen. Felt like I’d just run a marathon, and I have no fucking idea what it feels like to run a marathon.”
Dave nodded knowingly beside Landon, and Graham murmured in assent. “So I went for a pint to brush it off,” Fox said. “I was sitting at the bar next to the door, exit sign in view with a straight shot out the door, and it hit me like a fuckin’ train. Doesn’t matter where I am: I sit close as I can to the exit. I’m always scanning for exits, everywhere. Anyway, it got me thinking about Theo and what he’s been through, ya ken?”
Fox’s words had quite literally propelled Rose to the edge of her seat. “Fascinating,” she said. “Great topic.”
“What does the body remember that our minds do not?” said Isolde. “That’s cerebral stuff.”
“I lock doors,” Graham said. “I’ve never once felt unsafe, and I’m constantly locking doors. There was a time last month I must have been on autopilot, and I locked you out of the house”—he paused to brush a hand over Rose’s head—“even though I knew you were just a few minutes behind me, catching up with a neighbor.” Rose gave him a look that said,That was no bother. It made Landon want to hurl.
“Just last week I was getting the oil in my car changed, and the smell made me sick,” said Isolde. “And it’s weird because I don’t think it’s a bad smell, like, inherently. Other Isolde wrote me a six-page note, and there wasn’t a single mention of engine oil. Maybe it’s nothing.”
“Maybe you’re pregnant,” Idris offered.
Isolde rolled her eyes. “Doubtful. Very doubtful.”
“Every morning I reach over to turn off my alarm clock,” Maria said. “And I don’t set alarms.”
“Wish you would,” Fox mumbled. “It’s a bear gettin’ you up and out.”
“I’ve never thought about this before,” Rose said. Landon felt the tension as far as his fingertips. What didRose’sbody remember?
“I sob whenever I hear the national anthem. Buckets of tears,” Dave said. “My wife didn’t take the pill, so she has to know why I do it, but she just laughs. Says my other would have told me if he’d wanted me to know.”
“TheAmericannational anthem?” Maria clarified.
“‘God Save the Queen,’” Dave said with a huff. “Nothing embarrassing as all that.”
“You’re still with your wife?” Graham asked.
“That was the whole point. It’s why my other took the pill. The marriage was done, but they wanted to stay together for the kids. I’ve got two of ’em, seven and four. My wife claims we flipped a coin to see who’d actually take the pill, but now that I’ve been with her almost half a year, I think it’s more likely she wore me down.”
“Do you two have sex?” Rose asked. Landon was taken aback by her boldness—the way she hadn’t even tried to take the temperature of the room before asking.
“She says it’s the best sex of her life. Makes me feel a bit bad for my other.”
“There might be a topic in there for next week,” Graham said. “But I don’t want to short-change Fox’s topic. Rose and Jamie haven’t even shared yet.”
“I’m still thinking,” Rose said. “Jamie, you go ahead.”
Landon’s anticipation of Rose’s response had blinded him to the fact that he needed to come up with something plausible to continue to blend in with the group. “Oh, uh, I was still thinking, too.” He paused, considering. “I was thinking about what you said, Dave. About marriage. That’s an incredible sacrifice you made. Even if things were horrible at the end, your other must have loved her very much. Enough to start over without forgetting her.”
Dave shrugged. “Kids change the whole game.”
“Sure,” Landon said, only half listening, thinking through the gymnastics of staying as close to the truth as possible. “The other day while I was packing, I found a receipt in the pocket of my raincoat from two years ago, long before I took the pill. It was from a café a little ways from my house. Two coffees and two croissants. And on the back…” Landon’s voice cracked. “There was a note scribbled on the back. It was completely ordinary: ‘Dentist appointment—1:15.’ I really don’t know why I did it, but I traced the words with my finger. Felt an ache in my chest like I’ve never experienced before.”
“Someone your other knew wrote it,” Maria said, stating the very obvious. “Someone important.”
“The bad breakup,” Rose said gently.
“Yeah,” Landon said. “Probably.” If he closed his eyes, he and Rose were there again, at the French patisserie fifteen minutesdown the road from their house that served the best croissants they’d ever eaten—croissants they’d both decided had magical, healing properties. Two coffees and two croissants to start, always, followed by a slice of chocolate cake to split if the week had been long or hard enough. It was a ritual that had lasted as long as they had. Finding the receipt in his raincoat marked up with Rose’s lazy scrawl had all but undone him. Packing had been fairly haphazard after that, and in the end he was lucky he’d even made the flight.
“Rose?” Graham prompted.
