Push.
Push.
Push.
“Shoulders are out,” the doctor said. “We’re getting baby out on this contraction, Rose. One more good push. Bear down and give me one more good push.”
No pain like this ever again, nothing like this ever again, the pain, the pain, the pain. Push, push, push.
“Push!” Landon yelled over the roaring in her ears. “Rose, I can see the baby. Rose, I can see them. I can see them, they’re here, they’re here, please, Rose, please.”
Nothing but the pain, nothing but the roaring in her ears, nothing but push, push, push. She held Landon’s hand and screamed through the pain, screamed as baby’s shoulders tore through her, screamed as baby’s legs finally, finally, slipped out of her, screamed as she and the baby were no longer one, but two, screamed and screamed until Landon’s hands were there, on her face, wiping back hair and tears and sweat and kissing the corners of her eyes.
“She’s here,” he said, through thick sobs. “She’s perfect.”
A girl.
“Where is she?” She was tired—so, so tired—but even afternearly two days of slow progress and sudden emergency, her body ached for the child. “They’re checking her vitals,” he said. “Cleaning her up. But she’s here. She’s going to be okay.”
“Go check on her,” Rose said, eyes fluttering. “Protect her.”
“She’s safe.” Landon leaned over the bed and kissed her cheeks, cradled her head in his hands. “She’s safe, Rose. I’m not leaving you.”
And then she was there. The doctor placed the baby on her chest, on the exposed skin of her chest, the robe having lost its hold at a point Rose could no longer remember. She could no longer remember a lot of things. Who had she been, before this little being was laid on her chest? Who had she been, before these little cries and gurgles sounded in her ears? It hardly seemed to matter.
“Cordelia,” she said. It was the name her father hadn’t wanted to burden her with. She and Landon had gone back and forth—burden or blessing?—but staring into this creature’s dark gray eyes, she could not imagine any other name. She was beloved. Most beloved.
“Cordelia,” Landon agreed.
She’d just placed a kiss on the baby’s soft head when she felt the warm gush. Rose knew something was wrong before any one of the medical professionals in the room could confirm. She shifted slightly, clutching Cordelia to her chest, and the wetness spread. Her vision blurred, the room softening. Her fingers prickled. She was cold.
Someone called her name. A hand pressed down on her stomach. Her baby was ripped from her body a second time.
“She’s losing too much,” Rose heard through the haze.
Bright red on her hands, bright red on the bed.
Blood. She was losing too much blood.
She tried to speak, to lift her arm, but her body had stopped cooperating. Nausea pounded through her, fast as the beating of her heart.
In, out, she drifted. In, out.
Rose tried to hold on to the sound of her baby’s cry, that primal call for safety. Her cries were as perfect as she was, but so, so far away. Slipping away. Like she was never there. Like neither of them had ever been there.
Chapter Twenty-One
Landon had many fears, but he’d never considered he might also be claustrophobic until he was forced to hunch his shoulders and tuck his face into his chest to descend into the vault, each step dragging him deeper into the stifling dark.
“Are you hanging in there?” Rose whispered behind him.
Landon gulped. “Never better.” He took a step down but didn’t stoop quite low enough, banging his head on the ceiling. He let out a small whimper despite his every effort not to.
“These vaults were built in the late eighteenth century,” the tour guide said from somewhere in front of them, her lantern keeping only the nastiest of the shadows at bay. “The idea was that they’d be used for storage, but there’s a damp down here that seeps into your bones. Ruined their goods, too, so the merchants abandoned them. That’s when the scavengers descended: thieves, smugglers, body snatchers. People lived here, starved for air and light, sometimes with no way out.”
“What the hell is a body snatcher?” Landon asked.
“Ask the guide.”
