“Chad, just stop,” I attempt to say firmly. “If you’re trulyquestioning yourself or having a bi-awakening, then good for you. I’m happy for you, really, but that doesn’t mean you should be throwing yourself at me. You have no idea what you’re actually into, and you have no idea what I’m into either. I mean, shit, you barely know me at all.”
For a moment, I think my reminder might have actually gotten through to him. But then he looks at me hesitantly. “You can tie me up and have your way with me, Daddy.”
Where the fuck did that come from?The words sound so sensual falling from his lips, even if that’s a ridiculous title. I let out a loud, frustrated groan as I yank out the hair tie that’s doing a shit job of keeping my hair in a bun. I attempt to secure the loose strands away from my face and tie it back up. I need to have some small semblance of control in this moment or I’m going to give in to this ridiculously attractive man who’s throwing himself at me.
I am too hungover to have to be this responsible. “Stop, Chad. That’s not what I fucking meant. Let’s just pretend you didn’t say that.”
He doesn’t seem deterred. “You can?—”
“No, I don’t want to do any of that with you,” I insist, cutting him off. There’s no way I’ll be strong enough to shut him down again if he continues to offer to let me have my way with him.
I need to get him to drop this, to understand that I’m not what he wants. “Chad, you’re clearly going through something. Last night, you were sad about Blake living at the farm now that he’s with Liam. I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but you referred to us as them. That isn’t the foundation of a good relationship, even if you have figured out you’re bi or whatever other label you land on. We are our own people. I can’t be your Liam because I will never be Liam. Just like you’ll never be Blake.”
He smiles at me, full of hope. “I don’t want us to be them, and I don’t want you to be Liam. But I want us to have a chance.I already told you I’d move to your house last night when we exchanged vows. I meant that. I’m serious aboutus.”
“How can you be serious about us when you don’t even know me?” I demand, hating how desperate I sound. Desperate for him to listen to me, obviously. There’s no way he could convince me that what he’s saying is true.
“I think I do know you, and what I don’t know, I’m excited to find out. We have so much fun together, John,” he insists, sticking his bottom lip out. Jesus Christ, there might even be tears in his eyes as he continues. “I think we’d be great for each other. Let me prove it to you. Please don’t annul our marriage, please.”
I stare at him for a long moment. Clearly, what I’ve already said isn’t working, and I don’t want him crying. Maybe he just needs some time for the situation to sink in, to realize this whole thing was a mistake and whatever future he’s imagining won’t be happening.
I can do that. I can give him time.
“Fuck. Fine, whatever. The legal shit doesn’t even matter. It’s not like I’m ever going to get married again,” I grunt, ignoring the relief I feel as his expression morphs back into his signature giant smile and he wraps his arms around my neck.
“I promise to be the best husband ever,” he whispers into my ear.
Nope. Too much. I step back, forcing myself to keep distance between us. I need to set clear boundaries and expectations so neither of us gets hurt.
“You’re not going to be anything to me, Chad,” I remind him. “Some piece of paper saying we made a drunk mistake doesn’t mean you’ll actually be in my life. If you’re going to freak out about annulling it, fine, we can skip that part. But nothing is going to change. And remember what I said: No one else ever needs to know. Don’t tell anyone, especially not Blake.”
I don’t need Liam, or worse, Blake, weighing in on this and making me feel guilty that I took advantage of Chad while he was drinking, or fuck, trying to convince me to see if there could actually be something between us. Nope. Much safer if we don’t involve anyone else.
“You’re wrong,” he insists. “I don’t think this was a mistake at all. Maybe you just need some time for it to sink in. But you’re right, we shouldn’t ruin Blake and Liam’s bachelor party by telling everyone and making this weekend about us, anyway. We can wait and tell them after their wedding. Unless they’re suspicious before then since I’ll be living with you. But I can just say I wanted to be closer to Blake during the planning without overstepping and living in their house with them.”
“You aren’t living with me,” I remind him.
Chad shrugs. “If you need some time to get your house ready, that’s fine. But I think sooner is better than waiting too long. I can’t wait to discover all the things you’re into, you kinky minx.”
“Jesus, help me.” Why does he keep bringing up kinky shit? Is it that obvious that I’m into it?
He turns to me with an earnest expression. “Are you religious? It’s probably something I should know about my husband.”
“Not your husband, and definitely not religious.” Why did he ask that? He’s so fucking strange.
He nods. “The great state of Nevada says differently, and so do our matching rings. I think we could build a really beautiful life together, John. As soon as you’re ready, I am. Just imagine all the fun we’ll have. I’m going to make you so happy.”
I scoff. If only it were that easy.
Chad must really believe it, though, because he continues as if this whole situation between us was meant to be. “Do you want to shower with me, Hubby?”
What the fuck is even happening?
Is he seriously refusing to accept that we aren’t going to act like we’re married? It really does seem like no one has denied him anything his entire life. It’s actually absurd that someone could be so fucking spoiled. I squint at him, looking for any sign of hesitation or doubt. But there’s none. He really wants me to shower with him, so I let out a deep sigh. “Go shower, alone, Princess. Now.”
“Ohhh, yes, sir,” he responds suggestively, and damn it, he’s infuriating, but it also takes every ounce of self-control I have not to give in just for the rest of our time here.
But I can’t.
