“And I gotta say, I think the whole this-is-just-for-fun thing is bullshit.” Cole focused back on me, his expression serious. “I didn’t see four people fucking around up onstage when we watched you. I saw a real band who were only held back by the fact they didn’t want to play original material. You wrote that one song you played, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you know what’s wrong with that song?”
I furrowed my brows. “What?”
“Absolutely fucking nothing. Keep writing and playing stuff like that, and soon enough people will be begging for that over the covers.”
This was too much for me. “We’re not trying to become the next big thing, Cole. Trust me, we are not cut from the same cloth as you guys. But I hear you about speaking my mind to the others. You’re right. At the very least, I can make my opinion on it clear, and maybe that will sway them.”
“Good. But I’m right about the other thing. too.”
I stared at my food, moving pieces of orange chicken around with my chopsticks.
At the end of the day, I knew that if I didn’t try to give Through Azure Skies another chance, I’d regret it. The thought of not playing with anyone after the album with Bleeding Moonlight was over made my chest feel hollow.
I plopped my box on the counter and stood up, feeling a new sense of determination. “Thanks guys. Tomorrow, I’m going to try to convince them to keep going. Wish me luck.”
Ezra’s eyes crinkled as he smiled. “You got this. Call us afterward, okay?”
“Will do,” I said, walking up to Cole to hug him goodbye.
“Oh, hell no, we’re not going back to that.” He pushed me back by my shoulders. “At least not when we’re in private.” He smirked before crushing my lips against his, his hands traveling down to my hips.
I pulled away breathless and turned to see Ezra watching us with hooded eyes. He reached his palm out to me. “Let me walk you out.”
Grasping his calloused hand, I walked out of the house, where the quotidian sight of my car seemed completely at odds with the day I’d just had.
I exhaled heavily and turned to Ezra. “Look, today was amazing, but I’m still not sure if I want to do it again.”
His forehead wrinkled as he waited for me to go on.
“I… Let’s just say the whole thing didn’t feel nearly as casual as I thought it would.”
His expression softened as he squeezed my hand. “It didn’t feel casual for me, either. Or for Cole.”
“I would never want to do anything to jeopardize the album. If we keep doing this and things get complicated… If the other guys find out—”
Ezra dropped my hand and cupped my face with his palms. “Is that what you’re worried about? Adeline, the album wouldn’t exist if it wasn’t for you. And Silas and Abel— Look, we won’t say a word, but if they find out, I promise you Cole and I will handle it. For once, stop worrying about everyone else. Be selfish and do whatyouwant.”
I wanted them, that much was clear to me. If my life were a book, today would be a major plot point. What had started as living out a sexual fantasy had turned into something so much deeper that I couldn’t see the bottom from where I stood. Our relationship had shifted, irrevocably so, and this new intimacy was intoxicating. It had been so long since I’d had anything like that in my life.
“Everything will be just fine,” Ezra insisted.
Pulling out of his reach, I averted my eyes. I was less certain about Abel’s reaction, but I was confident that Silas would not be “just fine” if he ever found out. I wanted to get Ezra’s advice, but something held me back from telling him about what had happened between the guitarist and I. I felt like an idiot. The intensity of my feelings toward Silas had scared me away from him, but what about my feelings for Ezra and Cole? After today, I wasn’t sure they were all that different.
I needed to go home and process everything.
“Let me think about it this weekend, okay?”
Despite still wearing a concerned expression, Ezra nodded, probably sensing it was in everyone’s interest to give me some space. Reaching up on my toes, I gave him a peck on the lips before getting into the car.
It was dusk by the time I got home. Molly was watching TV and munching on a big bag of pre-popped popcorn that had some kind of a sugary coating.
I plopped down on the couch beside her and reached into the bag.
She whined in protest. “I thought you didn’t like this one.”
