Trinity stoodby the massive window in her office, her hands clasped behind her back as she assessed the sprawling city view below. “I can see you’ve managed to gain their respect quickly, something not everyone is able to do. Still, I can’t for the life of me figure out how they got the idea to pitch you as their photographer. Is that something you discussed in advance?”
Beads of sweat had formed at the small of my back, soaking through my dress shirt. Self-consciously, I tugged the fabric away with my hand. “I can assure you we didn’t. I had no idea Kaz would say that.”
“He wasn’t entirely wrong about your work.”
Wait, what? My mouth gaped open.
“I took a look at the photos you sent me on Friday. They’re impressive.”
She was still facing away from me, and instead of being thrilled about the rare compliment, I felt my anxiety rise. “Thank you. I’m trying my best.”
Finally, she turned, her face void of any emotion. I gulped, my fingernails digging into my palms. “Is there anything else?”
“Yes. Given the amount of good content you already got in just a week, I don’t foresee you needing to stay on this task for much longer. Another week maybe. After that, there are a number of administrative projects for Last Rites we need to focus on.”
Disappointment trickled through me, but I hid it behind a shaky smile. I knew this photography gig wouldn’t last forever. I just didn’t expect it to end so soon. “Of course. That sounds great.”
I was dismissed with a curt nod.
My desk felt foreign after being away from it for a week. I sat down and eyed the photo of Ade and me. It had been taken at the first concert she played with Bleeding Moonlight, the same night they’d asked her to join their band and she’d agreed. I’d never seen my sister as happy as she’d been that day. Her dream had come true. She was finally a professional musician, and I couldn’t be prouder.
Is that how she felt when I told her I’d gotten my job at Hyperion? She knew all about the competitive interview process, and when I received the offer, she was thrilled I’d gotten my “dream job”. I was taken aback when she called it that. I guess I’d hyped it up quite a bit to her, but I’d never thought of it as a dream job. It was a step toward independence and security, and it was a good fit for me, but it had never been my dream.
Maybe I just wasn’t born to be a dreamer.
Shaking out my stiff shoulders, I reached for my laptop just as my phone buzzed with an incoming message.
It was Kaz. He wanted to see me.
“I can’t ditch work.”I wrote.
“Your work is at our place. Come over.”
“I need to do some in-person stuff at the office. Maybe in a few hours.”
“Did I screw things up?”
I bit on my upper lip and let out a slow breath. Without a doubt, Kaz had overstepped, but I couldn’t bring myself to be mad at him. He’d gone to bat for me, pitched me to my terrifying boss, and made it clear he thought I was better than an accomplished photographer.
It was ridiculous.
It was unhinged.
It also made my heart feel all weird.
“No. Everything is fine.”
It did cross my mind he may have only been trying to get inside my pants, but why would he when I already told him I’d sleep with him? No, that wasn’t it. At least, not entirely. My gut told me he genuinely thought I was good at taking pictures.
What if I listened to him? What if I gave photography a real shot?
I chewed on my nails. How would it even work? It’s not like I could afford to quit this job. I was barely making it in LA. I had no savings to speak of and an apartment I was desperate to move out of. The only way I could give it a shot would be to ask Ade for a lot of help.
A solid mass materialized on top of my chest. I couldn’t do it. My sister had given meeverything,and for what? For me to end up on her doorstep admitting I couldn’t make it on my own? It was pathetic. Not a real option.
I needed a plan to stick to. I’d get my promotion, work at Hyperion until I saved up a bit, and then reevaluate what I wanted out of my career.
* * *
