“Two days.”
Two days. It feels like just seconds ago that I was holding that gun, my finger on the trigger.
“Is the pakhan dead?”
“Yes.”
“Then you’re a Ferraro capo.”
“I am.” There’s no happiness in his tone. Not even relief at having gotten his promotion. Is it because he’s worried about me? Or is it something else?
I register the bandage on his arm. “You were hurt?”
“It’s nothing. Just a graze that’ll heal in no time.” He gives me a soft smile. “You saved both of our lives.”
“What about Ekaterina?”
Nero’s jaw hardens. “She’s gone.”
Gone. As in dead. As in…I killed her.
Ikilledsomeone.
The realization hits like a punch to the gut, followed by a wave of nausea so strong I groan.
“I’ll call the doctor,” Nero says.
Those moments in the bathroom replay in my mind like a nightmare. I bite on the inside of my mouth and taste copper. Oh God. What have I done?
I’m a killer. I took someone’s life.
It doesn’t feel real. It doesn’t feel like something I’m capable of, but the truth is there. Undeniable and cold.
I pulled the trigger.
There’s no coming back from this. I’ll never be the same. How can I be? I’ve done the unthinkable.
The door bursts open, revealing a man in scrubs. “Hello, Blake,” the doctor says. “How are you feeling?”
I press my hand to my lips. “Like I’m about to be sick.”
“That’s normal after anesthesia,” the doctor explains, moving to check the monitors. “You might feel nauseous, dizzy, and disoriented for a few days until your body adjusts.”
It’s not the anesthesia. It’s the fact that I’ve done something I never thought I was capable of, and amidst the shock, confusion, and fear, there’s one emotion that’s missing.
Guilt.
“Are you in pain?”
I blink and force myself to answer his question. “My abdomen is.”
“I’ll adjust your pain medication.” He reaches for the IV line and carefully turns a dial. “We had to remove a bullet. By the time you arrived, you’d lost more than a liter and a half of blood.”
“When can she go home?” Nero asks, his voice tense.
“I’d like to keep her here for another five days at least, as we need to monitor her for any potential infections. In addition, I want to make sure she doesn’t bleed more.”
Five days? After the motorcycle accident, they discharged me the next day. Probably because we didn’t have insurance, and my father wasn’t keen on paying for my care out of pocket.
