“I’ll always be watching over you,” he says softly.
“It’s not the same,” I whisper.
He smiles sadly at me. “I know, baby girl. I’m proud of you, and I know you and Viking will make it through this.”
I shake my head in denial.
I have spent three weeks away from my husband. Not hearing him or seeing him is harder than I thought it would be. Of course, lately I had only seen him when I went to the clubhouse. I often went there because the quietness of our house was horrible. I felt so lonely and was glad that Viking still let me come to the clubhouse as that is where I received the support from my club friends that helped me push through these past years.
I sob into my father’s chest and just let everything I have been holding inside go.
My sister and mother come in during my cries and climb onto the bed with tears in their eyes.
“The three most important women in the world. My shining stars,” my dad rasps, his voice getting weak.
My sister grabs my hand as the tears fall from her eyes, and my mom lets out a heartbreaking cry.
“Don’t cry, my dear. You gave me a lifetime of love. I’ll be watching over all of you,” he rasps.
“I love you so much, my sunshine,” my mother chokes out as my father’s breathing slows down.
I don’t know how long we lay there, but we don’t move.
When my dad’s hand holding my hair weakens, I look over to see he’s not breathing. I know his time is up.
“You can’t leave me. My sun, don’t leave me. I don’t know how to live without you,” my mother cries out in pain.
I couldn’t stop the tears even if I wanted to. I look at my sister who looks like she’s having the same problem.
My phone buzzes in my pocket and I grab it. My heart jumps when I look at the screen.
My love:I miss you so much, baby. I will do whatever it takes to make it up to you. I’m not going to let you go.
Dani must have given him my new number, or maybe Whiz found it.
Another sob leaves me. I need him so much right now, but I know I can’t count on him.
No matter how desperately I want to.
I hold my mother and sister tightly as my father’s body gets taken away. My mother falls to her knees bringing us both down with her.
At some point, my three aunts come rushing in and see the state of my mother before they take her from us.
“We’ve got your momma. You guys just take care of each other,” my aunt Helen says.
I grab my sister and head towards my room.
We don’t say anything. Instead, we just lay there in our grief. One of my aunts brings us food and drink, but we barely touch it.
After what could be a few hours or another day, I’m not really sure, my sister finally speaks up.
“You know, dad regretted the things he said the moment you left. He broke down. I had never seen him looking as lost as he looked the moment the door clicked shut. He spent every day trying to figure out a way to get you to forgive him but, as the years went on, he figured it was too late,” she tells me.
I think over her words for a moment. “I missed you guys every day. Then, when things started getting hard with Maverick, I had only wished I could call you guys, but I was afraid of an ‘I told you so’ response.”
“What happened?” she asks, turning to face me to give me her full attention.
I let out a long sigh. “I guess it just started off small. Every month, when my period came, it was just another disappointment that we didn’t get pregnant. We both slowly pulled away. The pet names we called each other stopped; the light touches were fewer and farther between. Then, he was always staring when the club whores would be fucking or sucking a brother. After a while, I guess the silence came and he stopped coming home.” I give her the brief version. I don’t think I could handle telling her everything.
