I hold up my gloved hand, the one that bears my bond mark. “We’re going to ‘spark’ our match.”
Forty-Four
Elodie
Uncle Nik gets up from the table and motions to the door. “Everything’s in place, then. The rest is up to you.”
My fingers clench around the vial of poison he handed me minutes ago. My lungs clench too, so tight I can’t breathe.
The words tumble from my mouth. “I don’t know if I can really do this.”
Nik peers down his nose at me, his dark gaze as inscrutable as always. I can never tell how much he actually cares aboutme.
He saved me from the ruin my life would have become if the truth about my glim and Asher’s death had come out, but how much was that because I’m his niece and how much because I’m a tool he wants to use?
His voice is equally unreadable. “We’ve been training for this first mission for months, Elodie. It’s your way to start settingmore things right after the wrong you did. Or does restoring the balance not matter to you anymore?”
If I say it doesn’t matter, he’ll reveal everything—to Mom, to the three matches I still have.
In the back of my mind, I see how Cole’s eyes will harden with revulsion, how Byron will recoil in horrified shock, how Salvatore’s anger will twist his face.
I hear Asher’s last scream as I killed him.
My stomach lurches, and I stiffen my spine.
“No. It does matter, a lot. I can do it. I’ll be fine.”
Uncle Nik nods approvingly. “And I’ll be right here backing you up the whole way through…”
The chime of my phone’s alarm cuts through the last remembered word. I blink into bleary awareness, my gut still listing with nausea.
Inhaling and exhaling gradually, I summon my mantra.
I have all I need. I have all I need.
Uncle Nik isn’t here right now. As far as I know, he’s nowhere near me in this reality.
But I’m still about to set off on a mission I might regret.
I still have that one secret I haven’t told my matches.
Do they need to know? I told them the worst part—about my innate power and how it killed Asher—and that didn’t shake them much. Everything that came after…
Would they understand why I accepted Nik’s deal? Why I took so much more blood onto my hands?
I’m never going to head down that path again, and I never wanted to do it in the first place. So maybe that one dark blemish on my past can simply be left there, undisturbed.
I push myself off the bed with a glance toward the window. A faint glow from the streetlamps glazes the night beyond.
It seemed like a good idea to squeeze in as muchof a nap as I could before tonight’s training exercise. I wish the attempt had left me clearer-headed rather than rattled.
Giving myself a shake, I grab the hoodie I picked out and pull it over the long-sleeved tee I’ve paired with yoga pants. Captain Ross instructed us to dress for physical activity.
My fingers brush over the delicate chain of the bracelet Asher gave me. It doesn’t feel totally right—him protecting me.
I’d like to chain up the door to his house so he can’t follow me into tonight’s danger.
I drag a breath deep into my lungs, steadying myself.
