“I know.”
“Why didn’t you just talk to me?” As her words come out faster, they blend together, almost like…
“Have you been drinking, baby?” I try to keep my question gentle and non-accusatory, and whether or not I achieve thatdoesn’t seem to matter. Her inhibitions are down and her voice gets a little smaller.
“Yeah, but not much. I played pong beer, and then Vinnie got me a pink drink in a bottle that tastes like candy. It’s my first time.”
“Do you mean beer pong? And first time what?”
“Yeah, that one. And drinking.”
My eyebrows raise. She’s never had alcohol before? “And that’s all? Just the beer pong and pink drink?”
“Yeah.”
“Vinnie, is that Vinnie from our class?” The situation is starting to form in my mind, and I’m not enjoying the picture that is being painted.
She’s at a party, and if the hockey team is there, then it’s probably happening at their frat house, and even I have heard the stories about that place. Fan-fucking-tastic.
“Yeah. He was hanging out with me until Will got back, but he never came back. And then Vinnie started hooking up with a Barbie that wasn’t Oakley, and I can’t find Oakley. And now I’m alone.” The most adorable hiccup I have ever heard comes through the phone.
Gritting my teeth, I force myself to ask the question that will burn a hole through my soul if I don’t know the answer. “Baby girl, are you on a date with William tonight?”
There’s a pause. A long one.
My grip on the couch turns into a fist, and my heart is hammering in my chest. Is she trying to move on from us?
“No, maybe? I don’t know. He invited me, but I haven’t seen him for most of the night. And Oakley is somewhere. And I’m not really sure I even wanted to come tonight, but I thought I should, because you know, I’m not your baby girl anymore and I’m a college student. I should do college student things.” Shehiccups again. “Like, go to a frat party and get mildly drunk. Get up to crazy shenanigans.”
My heart aches for her because, with every word, she sounds more and more miserable. I force a smile, not wanting my agitation to make hers worse. “Shenanigans?”
The sound of liquid sloshing comes through the phone before the pop of lips breaking the seal on a bottle. “You know, like join a sorority or whatever. Hook up with guys. Party every weekend. I don’t know. I’ve never shenaniganed before.”
I don’t know what to say to that, so I stay quiet. She should be doing all those things. She should be having the ultimate college experience and living her life to the fullest. Instead, she has managed to tie herself to four men almost twice her age, and all we seem to be doing is making her sad.
“But anyway, that’s not why I called you.” Strength returns to her tone, and I can just imagine her sitting up straight, shoulders back as she glares at whatever is in front of her.
“Why did you call me?”
“I’m mad at you. I wish we never met.”
All the air rushes out of me like I’ve been locked in a sudden vacuum. But then her rambling continues.
“I was going to kiss Will tonight, but the more I think about it, I don’t think I can do it. And it’s all your fault. Well, you and my other daddies.”
My mouth almost refuses to cooperate, but eventually, I force words out through clenched teeth. “Why’s that?”
I remind myself that she is a little tipsy. What she is saying isn’t actually how she truly feels, just how she feels in this moment.
“Because he’s a boy.”
That startles a laugh out of me. “We’re boys, too, baby.”
“Mm-mmm, no. You’re daddies.”
Every negative emotion that has sloshed through my system since the beginning of this conversation evaporates from my body, leaving me slightly lightheaded.
This phone call has been a goddamn fucking roller coaster.
