The fact that he’s more present in my head than the trauma?
I’m sure a therapist would have a lot to say about that.
But, fuck it.
What’s one more thing to suppress?
16. AURORA
Two days later, I’m sitting on the edge of Layla’s bunk, dangling my legs while I hang out with Candy in the small confines of their cell. Layla is off on a double shift, leaving the two of us in a rare moment of semi-privacy.
There’s a different vibe coming off the girl today. Less broken, more hopeful.
“I’ve got something to tell you,” Candy says, bundling up a fresh pile of laundry lint. She looks down at the gray mass in her lap, her fingers moving in a strange, repetitive plucking motion.
“About the fluff?” I ask, nudging her. “Seriously, tell me. Is Dot building a wig? Or a very soft mattress?”
Candy’s eyes dart to the cell door. “It’s just… work, Rory. She wouldn’t want me talking about it.”
What the fuck? I’m going to talk to Taliesin about this. I can’t have Candy being terrified of her supervisor.
She tucks the fluff away. “Forget that, I have something better to tell you.” Her expression shifts to a genuine smile. “I’ve picked it. My new name.”
I smile back. “Finally. OK, don’t tell me, let me guess. Since you’re a Digger now, is it something tough? Like… Hunter? Or Stone?”
She pulls a face. “Stone? Really, Rory? Pebble would be more like.”
“Fair enough,” I laugh. “So, what else? Hmm, something cute then… Bunny? Wren? Ooh, I can totally see you as a Wren.”
“Wren is actually kind of cool,” she muses, then shakes her head. “But no. Guess again.”
“Fine, fine. Is it something really Elite, like Seraphina or Anastasia?” I tease, dodging the pillow she chucks at my head.
“Ugh. Too many syllables,” she says. “And far too posh. Nope, my new name is, drum roll…”
I oblige and beat out a rhythm on the side of the bed.
“Sky.”
I stop laughing and say it out loud. “Sky.” It feels right. “I like it. Why Sky?”
She clambers up the bunk to sit down beside me, her shoulder bumping mine. “Because, this sounds silly, but it doesn’t disappear. I don’t want to disappear again. I want to travel, see other places, be free and beautiful and important—at least to myself, and hopefully someone else as well eventually.”
“Sky,” I repeat, nudging her. “It suits you perfectly, and I hope you know you’re already important. You and Layla are my besties now.”
She beams at me. “Really? Truly?”
“Truly, even though Lay scares the shit out of me sometimes.”
Sky giggles. “Her bark is worse than her bite. I like that she’s fierce. What about Tally? Aren’t you friends with him? You are always together.” She gives me the side-eye. “Or are youmorethan friends?”
I feel my stomach do a slow, awkward roll. “Definitely not what you’re implying.”
Sky pokes my arm. “I know I’m fucked up about sex and stuff, but I can still want my friend to have romance. The way he looksat you makes it obvious that if you aren’t doing it now, you will be very soon.”
I focus very intently on a loose thread on my jumpsuit. The silence stretches out until it becomes painful.
“Rory?” Sky’s smile falters. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything. Sorry, don’t be mad.”
