‘We got a little distracted walking back here last night. I guess the drinks got to us more than we thought and then next thing I knew, we were...’
He swallows.
‘So, you two . . . ?’
‘No, of course not! We’ve only kissed. She’s in a relationship... I would never.’
‘You do realise how stupid that sounds?’ I ask.
‘Yep. Realised the second I said it,’ he says. ‘Look, it’s fucked. I know it is.’ He throws his hands up in the air and leans back against the wall dejectedly before continuing. ‘Does it help if I think I might actually like her?’
The words leave his mouth slow and heavy, sinking to the floor. I’ve seen this look before in my friends and in my sisters. He’s fallen for her. Fallen very hard.
‘Noah...’ I sigh and he lifts a hand, begging me to stop.
‘She’s just got something about her,’ he says sadly.
Yeah, a boyfriend, I think. But I don’t dare say it out loud.
He continues meekly. ‘And I think she might like me too.’
‘You can’t go there. Not while she has a man,’ I say softly.
He nods with defeat before throwing his head back against the wall, the soft knock echoing down the empty hall.
‘What do I do?’ he asks.
He doesn’t want an answer. At least, not an answer that I’m willing to give. But he has to dosomethingto help him through the horrible position he’s landed himself in.
I don’t like seeing him like this, so void of his spark, all because of a stupid, drunken mistake. It takes everything in me not to point all my rage towards El, but I know deep down this isn’t solely her fault. They’re both adults, which means that even thoughshe’sthe one cheating, he still played a part in his knowing.
‘What do you want to do?’ I ask.
Although it feels like for ever, I’ve only known Noah for a few weeks now. I don’t know him well enough to guide him without a little help from his end.
‘Honestly?’ he asks.
He meets my eyes and I see that his have misted over. They are growing wetter every second. I nod softly, prompting him to carry on truthfully.
‘I want to go back in there and grab her face again, and kiss her under those covers and waste the whole day away,’ he says. ‘But I’m not going to.’
He spits out the last sentence bitterly, punctuating it with a deep, exasperated sigh. His back melts into the wall the best that it can as he tries to make himself disappear entirely.
‘What have I done?’ he groans, eyes closed in despair.
I reach my hand out to stroke his arm, provide support in any way. I trail it down his arm, my fingertips brushing his hairs as I go, before silently arriving at his hand. He squeezes my hand tightly as I clasp his. It’s the gesture he needed. The reminder that he’s not alone in any of this.
‘You made a mistake,’ I say softly. ‘Weallmake mistakes, but what’s important is that we move on from them. You know it was wrong and you’ve owned up to that now, so just make sure you don’t kiss her again.’
He shakes his head. ‘Of course not.’
They emerge less as spoken words and more as one deep and hurried breath. But there’s still truth to them. Even if it looks like their mere utterance has chipped away at him.
‘I’ve never done that before, you know.’ He peeks my way before dropping his eyes again. ‘I don’t usually – I’ve never – I’m not one to kiss girls who have boyfriends. I know how messed up it is.’
I shake my head. ‘Of course not. You strike me more as the type to go around kissing girls with husbands.Propercheating.’
The joke falls flat on the floor quicker than the speed at which it left my mouth.
