I decide to leave my coat on and take a seat.
“All right. Well—”
“Give me the short version.”
I chuckle and toss my head back. This is how she gets things out of me. She doesn’t want to dive deep. No dwelling on the details. She wants facts so she can suggest a solution and then call it good.
“I cheated and the other woman, Sydney, got pregnant, as you know. I didn’t react the way I should have when she told me about the baby, and now, I think I’ve waited too long. I don’t know what to say to her. I mean, I’ve texted her here and there, but heck, Ms. Coraline, she’s into the second trimester already. I’m not winning any gold medals for future father of the year.”
She nods slowly. Having her to talk to has been nice. I’d talk this over with my friends, but now that my best friend is dating my ex, and my other close friend is dating my ex’s best friend, it’s nice to have an outsider who listens. Someone who doesn’t hesitate to share an opinion with me. Who doesn’t rehearse her answers as if she needs to use her words very carefully. My friends mean well, but I did put us in an uncomfortable situation for a while. Everyone seems to be moving on now, so I don’t really want to bring up my cheating when they are all doing well.
“I see. Well, today is better than never if you ask me.”
I tell myself that every morning, and yet, it still hasn’t happened. I think I’m stalling because I’ve already messed up so much. The pressure I put on myself to get this right is disgusting.
“I don’t know what to say to her.”
She waves a hand in front of my face and huffs. “‘I’m sorry’ works as a great opening line.”
“Yeah, I gather it might.”
“And don’t text her. Call her. Find her. Talk to her in person.”
I take a breath. This is where it’s complicated. When it comes to my feelings for Sydney, I don’t fully understand them. I’m terrified as hell for our unknown future, but when I think of her being a part of it, a small piece of me relaxes. Until we slept together, being together was a lot of fun. Yeah, our friendship was new, but it was easy. It was natural. Now . . . it’s awkward. Cheating aside, this is why friends don’t have sex.
“Grandma, are you ready?” Ms. Coraline’s grandson dips his head in the door. “Oh, hey Mark. How’s it going?”
“Good.” I stand to help Ms. Coraline and hold her coat for her. She locks up behind us, and I wish them both a good day before I hop into my truck and head to the campus gym.
My shirt clings to my chest as I hold my position, dragging out the last exercise of our workout.
The first one to break buys lunch.
“Something on your mind?” Tripp, one of my good buddies, asks as we plank next to each other.
“I’m good.”
“I call bullshit,” Winston says from the other side of me.
“Yeah, these gym sessions lately are killer, but I know they are just hiding something,” Tripp grunts. “So, you need to spill.”
On the drive to campus, I thought about my discussion with my neighbor. I need to talk to Sydney, and I need to do it today. There are so many topics we need to cover, but the biggest one is where we will raise the baby. She can’t raise it in the dorms, and I have a house now, so it makes sense for her to move in with me. It’s a crazy idea, but I really do feel like it’s the right place to start.
Whether or not I mention it to my friends is another thing.
I break my form and drop my knees to the ground.
Looks like lunch is on me.
“I need to get home and shower.”
“And then what?” Winston drops to his knees too. “Sit around and do nothing till lunch?”
“I don’t do nothing,” I reply and wipe my face with a towel.
“Okay, what do you do? And I still don’t understand why you bought a house if you plan to move back to Manhattan. You should be smart with your money and rent.”
If anyone should know that money isn’t an issue for me, it’s Winston. Living in upper Manhattan was how we all met. Then, when Winston’s family moved to Wyoming to be closer to his mother’s family, and Tripp and I were looking for something different after graduating high school, we joined Winston here for college.
