I sneak a glance at her as I head to the restaurant to meet Tripp and Lennox for dinner. She’s wearing a navy-blue dress that shows her bitty baby bump beautifully, with knee-high brown boots and her hair is piled into a bun on her head.
I chuckle. She claims it was the only way she could do it after we messed it up in the living room.
“Are you sure this is okay?”
“Yes. We all know each other. There isn’t anything to be nervous about.”
“For you, maybe not. I’m the girl who used to date Tripp and is now going on a double date with him and his girlfriend, and I’m also the girl you cheated on one of their best friends with. Yes, we all know each other, but it’s still weird, right?
“Syd, stop. You are overthinking this way too much.”
“Maybe.”
“It’s just dinner. If you aren’t having a good time, tell me, and we can go. I’d never put you in a situation you don’t want to be in. I can turn this car around right now.”
“No, that’s not necessary.”
“I’d do it.”
“I know you would.”
She keeps her gaze out the window, chewing on her thumbnail.
“Care to share what’s on your mind?”
“I guess.” She shrugs. “It’s weird because . . . we are having a baby, not dating. Nothing about our relationship is normal and being together feels good but like we cheated the system. Like we are being rewarded for stealing because things are going well. It feels wrong. Weird. And now we are going on a double date with friends. Does any of that make sense?”
I nod. I fully hate that she feels that way, because it explains a lot of why she doesn’t want to be an actual couple, but I understand.
“It’s okay for us to be happy, Syd,” I say with as much reassurance as I can.
“Is it? We did bad things and never once were punished . . . we are just happy.”
“Do we have to be punished? I mean, I gave myself a pretty hard time internally, but instead of hanging on to it, I learned from it.”
“Huh.” She cocks her head to the side. “I like that. Thanks, Mark.”
“Anytime.” I reach over to hold her hand.
“Well, this was a great pep talk for this dinner.” Syd lets out a soft laugh and I smile.
“We probably could have chosen a better topic.”
“Too late now. Oh, look! That was the apartment I was supposed to move into.” She points across the street.
“Supposed?” I ask. I got the feeling she wasn’t planning on moving out, but she never said anything, and I wasn’t about to remind her.
“Oh, yeah.” She smiles sheepishly. “After being in a house, I don’t think I could do an apartment. So, for right now, I’m staying put.”
“That is definitely better pre-dinner conversation,” I say and pull into the parking lot.
“Then again, when you leave, I won’t be able to afford that house, so I’ll probably be looking for an apartment anyway.”
I park the truck, spotting the entrance where Tripp and Lennox are walking inside.
Even if I knew what to say to her after that, we don’t have time to dive into it.
We meet our friends in the lobby and as soon as our waitress shows us to our table, Syd starts the conversation off by asking how Tripp proposed to Lennox. Lennox beams, and as she goes into full detail of how their special moment went down, I can’t help but to give all my attention to Syd.
