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Ella and I freeze when we hear someone come into her room.
“Bet?” she mouths to me. I shrug. We both watch the handle on the closet door turn. I glance down at what I’m wearing; I look like me. And thankfully so, because the next thing I know, Mom’s standing in the doorway.
“Oh, good, you’re home,” Mom says to Ella. She glances at me, then looks back at El. “What are you two doing in here?”
“Just planning our outfits for the week,” Ella says casually. She turns and pulls a miniskirt off its hanger. “I like this better with the shirt you picked out,” she says to me.
“Fine,” I say. “I’ll give you the skirt if we can wear jeans with the blue sweater.”
Mom shakes her head at us and laughs. It’s no different from the way she’s always laughed, but knowing what I do about the double life she’s leading, it sounds… off. I want to ask what she’s doing home tonight, but I don’t want to spend more time with her than I have to. I hold back.
“I’ll leave you two to your planning,” she says, turning away. But before she leaves, she looks back at Ella. “Have fun tonight?”
“Sure,” El says, smiling.
“What flavor did you get?” Mom asks, like the answer is somehow important.
“Mint chip,” Ella says without missing a beat. I’m amazed at her skills as an actress. Mom nods, looks at both of us one more time, and turns and leaves.
“Good night,” she says before closing the door to Ella’s room. El and I look at each other wordlessly for a few long seconds. Then, after we’re sure Mom’s out of sight, I creep back to my bedroom, secrets still safe.
What I realize when I’m alone in my room is that I can’t decide whether I’m happy or sad about it.
twenty-one
Monday after school, the carpet is being cleaned in the commons, so cheer practice is cancelled. Time on my hands, I wander slowly from my locker to the parking lot. Sean’s hanging out with his guy friends, who have, apparently, complained about him being MIA lately. When I’m nearly to my car, someone calls my name. I turn to see Alison from dance waving at me.
“Hi, Alison!” I call. She hurries over, her shoulder bag smacking her on the hip as she walks. “What’s up?”
“Nothing much, just headed home,” she says. “How about you? Why aren’t you at cheer practice?”
“Cancelled due to carpet decontamination,” I say. She laughs. “Honestly, it’s nice to have the break. Dance was brutal today; I’m wrecked.”
“Same here,” she says, brushing her red hair out of her lip gloss. “I was thinking of stopping for coffee on the way home; I could use some downtime before seeing my family. You want?”
I cock my head to the side, considering. Mom doesn’t know cheer was cancelled, and Bet doesn’t need to leave for a while yet. I’m surprised to find myself able to say, “Yes, actually, that sounds great!”
Alison and I drive separate cars to a nearby coffee shop. At one point, I swear I see the red BMW that Mary woman drives behind me, but when I look again, it’s gone. Alison and I park in spaces next to each other, go inside, and order matching drinks. We and our skinny vanilla lattes settle into cushy seats by the window. We chat about dance and classes and how Principal Cowell seems to wear the same sport jacket every third day, and it’s just… easy. I never knew friendships could be like this.
When it’s getting toward Betsey’s time of the day, I tell Alison I need to get going. She nods, then looks at me seriously.
“Lizzie, you and Dave aren’t together anymore, are you?”
“What?” I say, caught off guard by the abrupt topic change.
“Dave Chancellor?” she says. “I mean, I know you went to the dance together, but you’re not still into him, right?”
I never was.
“Uh, yeah… I am,” I say. “We’re still together. Why?”
Alison’s eyes widen, then she frowns with purpose. “Listen, this is going to sound really weird, but I feel like we’re, like… friends… even though we haven’t hung out before today or anything.”
“I feel the same,” I say, smiling. “And I’m just oversubscribed. I’d love to do this again. It’s been really fun.”
“I agree,” she says, shifting like she’s suddenly uncomfortable.
