DAISY
“Idon’tknowwhyyoukeep assuming I know anything about babies,” I say as I pick up a cute, plush white lamb with long black eyelashes. “And if you say it’s because I’m a woman and have breasts, I’m going to shove this toy up your nose.” This man, with his big, strong build, buzz cut hair, fierce expression, and who is twice my size, looks so out of place in this beautiful store. Yet, beneath the harshness, I sense a softness he probably wouldn’t admit to. A man who does so much for a young mother and her baby must be extremely kind.
He pulls a face like he’s sayingI’d like to see you try. I bet he’d have the toy removed from my hand before I could lift it.
“I still can’t believe they’ve kept the store open for us.” We arrived two minutes before closing time. Kade said a few quiet words to the store owner, who immediately let us in.
“If you pay the right price, you can make anything happen,” he says, like it’s something that happens all the time. For him, it probably does. For normal people like me, I’d get told to come back tomorrow. He puts the monitor he was holding down andpicks up something round with what looks like a suction cap. “What is this?” He holds it up for me to see.
Smirking, I say, “It’s a breast pump to express milk.”
His eyes go round, like it’s going to bite him, and quickly puts it back on the shelf. “That looks dangerous.”
Giggling, I say, “We should be looking at clothes.”
He nods. “Good idea.”
We head to the clothing area. I pick out rompers, onesies, socks, and every other item of clothing that I think she’ll need and add them to the cart. Kade takes note of what I’ve picked and adds more of the same, but in different colors. There are enough clothes for Remi to have five outfit changes a day.
“I don’t think she needs all of this.”
Kade adds six muslin wraps to the cart. “Better to have too many than not enough.”
“She’ll probably grow out of the clothes before she can wear them all.”
“Then we’ll donate what she doesn’t wear.”
At least they won’t go to waste.
“At the tattoo shop, I heard you mention you run a charity for kids?”
He nods.
“I’d love to know about it.” I search through rompers that I think will fit Remi.
“It’s called the Youth of Hope Foundation. Me, Ash and Linc started it about five years ago. It raises money for children in need of free counselling, funding for their education, job opportunities for the older kids, and basic necessities.” His expression isn’t showing much emotion, yet I hear the pride in his voice.
“That sounds amazing.” I’m guessing, with his unstable upbringing, this is something he knows children in similar situations need. “I bet it’s helping so many children.”
He nods. This time, there’s a glimmer of pride in his expression.
I pick up a pale blue romper with tiny pink butterflies stitched into the fabric. “This is so pretty. I hope one day I’ll get to buy such beautiful clothes for my baby.” I run the soft fabric through my fingers. Kade pauses, bath towels wrapped in his large arms. I don’t think Natasha’s foster father touched the baby stuff in the bathroom, but I don’t bother saying anything. He’ll just add them anyway. I hold the romper to my belly. “It’s so amazing how they fit inside. Do you want to have kids someday?”
His face hardens. “No.” He drops the bundle into the cart.
I know it’s none of my business, but I ask, “Why not?”
We shuffle along to the tiny shoes. Not that I think a baby needs them, but I pick out a yellow and pale blue pair.
“I don’t want to ruin a kid’s life.”
“Why do you think you’d ruin a kid’s life?”
He picks up a cute, brown, fluffy bear. For someone who doesn’t know a thing about babies, he’s doing a great job in selecting things. “Because I’m fucked up. I never want a kid to live the kind of life I had.”
My heart breaks for the boy who had to live with foster parents who didn’t love and support him the way they should have. “Just because of what you went through doesn’t mean you’ll do that to your child. I’ve seen how you treat Natasha and Remi. I know you’d never do such a thing.”
Tossing the bear into the cart, he turns to me, his face blank of any expression. “You know nothing about me. Just because I’ve given a teenager and her kid a place to stay doesn’t make me father material.”
