Chapter
Twenty
Ryan
It’s been a week since Fox was last with her and the ache is starting to diminish. I’m glad Ryan was there for Amber. We've been texting every night. I keep seeing new sides to her. She’s like a diamond that gets shinier with every edge.
Her words race through my head all day and night. “I wish you could see that fear is holding you back from a future—and possibly happiness.” She’s right. Fear has been the one emotion dominating my life. I was afraid to move on from Harper, terrified to talk to Amber, too scared to have her meet Ryan, so instead I introduced her to Fox. Hell, Bear was the one who asked her out.
And it’s fear that’s holding me back from living.
I read over the reports Dr. Hanversford gave to me over two years ago. The research is solid and verified. I watch videos about success stories.
The tan line around my finger has faded, and I think it’s time to start really thinking about my future. When I get to the office, I’ll call Dr Hanversford and schedule an appointment. Hopefullyit won’t be around allergy season and my half doses of meds will be enough until my brain surgery.
With a renewed sense of peace and certainty, I pick up my phone and start typing her a message.
Me: It’s kind of weird feeling happy again.
Delete, that sounds too… truthful.
I retype and delete the message like five times before Bear comes over, reads it over my shoulder, and hits send. I’m about to punch the shit out of him when she texts back.
Amber: And what’s causing the sudden expression of joy in your life?
Me: You.
Amber sends me a picture of a handwritten note saying, “Do you like me? Check yes or no.”
Me: Am I not making it obvious?
She sends the picture again.
Amber: Sometimes a girl likes to know where she stands.
Me: Sure, I like you.
Liar … it’s so much more than ‘like’.
Me: Wanna come over tonight? I’ll cook.
Amber: I’ll bring something sweet … and dessert.
Bear reads the text over my shoulder as he walks around the kitchen making his protein smoothie. “I guess you want me out of the apartment?”
“I don’t care where you go or what you do. But yes. Leave.”
I bailed out of work early to clean and make sure the place isn't a total pigsty. Now there’s a knock at the door, and I check my hair in the reflection of a framed photo of the Smoky Mountains before opening it. Fuck—she's stunning. Cute dress, tight around the chest and flaring out. She’s wearing cotton thigh-highs and boots that hit just below her knees. Fox would want to pin her to a wall and fuck her brains out, but Ryan hasn’t earned that yet. She lifts up a cake box and smiles. Her joy does as much for my cock as her dress. Damn. It’s going to be a long night.
Her phone rings and she flinches. Is she expecting a call from Fox? He’s not calling. She hands me the cake box and digs through her purse for her phone. She looks at the screen, frowns, slides it back in, and places her purse on the kitchen counter.
“Is everything all right?” I ask. I don’t like seeing her disappointed.
“I’ve been getting lots of spam calls. No big deal.” She bounces on her toes and kisses me on the cheek. “So what’s on the agenda? World domination?”
“Food and a movie.”
She claps and smiles at me. “Excellent. I’m not wearing the right shoes for a hostile takeover.”
