“Should we start off with yoga or cardio?”
But Darren answers for me. “Whatever you do, I want him beyond exhausted, so he takes a nap.”
Dick.
CHAPTER 11
Alana
Day 1
Last night I ran the numbers, and two weeks was all I could give him. Everyone would be in Florida for the next five days, and Lance and Izzy wouldn’t be back for another few days after that. We could be low profile, have some fun and then vanish into the wind. Anything longer than a brief fling, and it increased the risk of getting caught.
What the hell changed? The best night of sleep I’ve had in years that wasn’t assisted by heavy medication? His damn sincerity?
This is a mistake—a huge one. He’s a client, he’s off-limits and we have a history. And I’ve put myself in the worst position possible.
I had a plan for the last five years—I should’ve stuck to it. It’s bad enough I bent the plan enough to give him one week, but two? What the hell was I thinking?
Worst of all, I might be putting him in danger by association. The madman trying to destroy the Four Families is still out there. This is literally the exact opposite of my job and what I’ve been trying to do for the last few years.
I could—no SHOULD—change my number and vanish. Again. Maybe I’ll spend more time at Grasshopper, my tech company. It’s based out on the West Coast. Distance and time, that’s what I need.
But I’m impressed by how far he’s come. When I first met him back in high school, we were assigned to be writing partners in English class. I had no idea who he was, we only had one class together. For four years we ran parallel lives that never intersected. He used to have massive panic attacks and bursts of anger when he couldn’t regulate his emotions. His brain played cruel tricks on him all the time, and his Fuck Nugget of a dad didn’t help matters either. Fuck Nugget used to feed into Davin… um, Grae’s worst fears. The attraction wasn’t instant and it took time, but I saw who he could be, and I saw the beauty in who he was.
And he kept my darker impulses in line. With him consuming most of my mental energy, I didn’t have time for revenge plans or destroying the evil around me. He showed me a better world, and that I could be strong without requiring destruction. Even in his worst moments, he gave me hope, light and love.
But when we broke up, all that light was extinguished. My friends and future vanished, and I gave in to every one of my darkest instincts. Thank Odin that Penny found and trained me. She opened my world to new paths, and I owe her everything.
Between Mastodon, The Four Families, other crime-adjacent allies and the Olympians, I have enough on my plate. There’re already too many worlds to juggle. And if Grae gets added to the mix, then that means Amanda comes too—and I don’t know if I want her in my personal life. I have zero ill will towards her, but another history is there, and I’m not sure how she will handle it. It’s more for her benefit than mine.
See? Too complicated. Just ghost him or respond with one-word answers. I’ve already spent too much energy on this.
Ignore that I came more last night than I have in the last two years total. Or that I slept better with him next to me than I have in a decade. Or that he made me feel cared for. He even got me food and clothes and left me alone in the shower.
When I come into the office, wearing the clothes Grae bought, Macie and Markus are standing over a phone.
Macie waves me over, “What do you mean we have to put a shutdown on Phoenix’s accounts?”
Phoenix is the name we use for Grae when we are talking in an official capacity. My stomach drops. We’ve put holds on accounts before, normally for a high-risk client, but never him.
“He’s too stoned right now to make any logical decisions.” Darren’s voice crackles through the speakers.
No. My brain screams that nothing about that sentence can be right. Grae doesn’t do drugs. There was the OD incident, but that was a straight up murder attempt. My breakfast is about to spill over Macie’s desk. I just left him, how the hell did he get drugs this fast? Did I push him over the edge?
“Can you repeat that?” Markus appears as green as I feel. Darren sighs like it’s this huge inconvenience.
“Phoenix is sex stoned. He met a girl last night, and now he’s being a total fucking idiot.” Oh, thank Odin. I can’t handle watching him OD again.
“So, he isn’t intoxicated and in need of medical assistance?” I ask.
“Boss, is that you?” Darren’s voice perks up.
“Yeah, I’m here.” He laughs, and I am in zero mood.
“I don’t know how you worked your magic, but you were able to find Pen Girl, his high school girlfriend he’s been pining over for years. Poor guy’s been looking for her for over a decade and, shit, he’s the happiest I’ve ever seen him.”
Every nerve is on fire, and my brain is trying to comprehend three incorrect statements. I didn't set him up, and he wasn’t searching for me for years, without it crossing my radar. Impossible. And there’s no way I made him that happy.
