“I couldn’t either.”
She studied the way his forehead creased a little, his eyes locking onto hers, like he was trying to shove aside his own inner demons to make space for her.
They hadn’t spoken yet of anything they’d said onboard Segura and leading into that last raid. There hadn’t been time. And, quite frankly, she hadn’t had the energy. Because the things they’d said…
It’s you, Kat. It will always be you.
Lee, you’re the one I want to be with.
Their words glimmered in a secret pocket in her head where she’d only occasionally allowed herself to peek, not wanting the events of the last few days to taint even a single syllable of the truths they’d braved in those most vulnerable moments. Those words were theirs, and theirs alone, and nothing could take them from her.
That alone had her swallowing past the lump in her throat, the quavering in her lungs. They would figure this out and steal this time for themselves. They would go wherever the stars may lead.
Starting with getting through this morning. She nodded towards the lower skywalk, and the gastronomy levels that would be turning on their lights any minute now. “Green juice?”
It still felt a little eerie to be up this early. The lowlights of morning on the ship were out of place to most of her memories down here. She may have walked a little bit closer to Lee than was necessary. He may have slowed his pace to let her.
Neither of them said much as they took one staircase at a time. She was content with just walking. Thinking. Trying not to feel things. Just existing in a world with she and Lee and the curious swarm of heat each time their elbows brushed. And by the second flight she was already feeling a bit more human. She would need that; it was a fight for humanity that had got them in high water with the AMG in the first place.
The barista behind the green juice bar in the Hideaway had just begun stocking the industrial fridge behind her, its melodical scanners and sensors beeping, tracking the motion and temperature as Kat settled on her morning lemongrass-carrot splash.
“Are you sure you don’t want to try one?” she asked, standing palms before her at the shiny steel countertop. “The betacarotene could do your head some good and lower your blood pressure.”
“Two please.”
A fresh juice in hand and a few endorphins in her blood; she would have happily surrendered her morning to more of this. But the rest of the Academy would be waking soon, and they had somewhere to be.
While Lee slipped into the showers, Kat found herself a better mirror, double-checking the lines she’d drawn around her eyes under normal lighting scenarios. It definitely could have been better. The outside corners really did look like they’d beendrawn by feral cats with photon-crayons. But it was fine given the circumstances.
They were running late to meet Zane and Whistler by the time Kat caught up with Lee again. He waited for her just inside the upper skywalk. Some clarity had returned to his eyes. But it wasn’t quite enough to combat the rumbling turbulence settling back over her as they climbed the stairways once more.
She recognized the floor for the PARC before they reached any of the Planning and Research Collaboration rooms. How strange to be back up here on the other side of things. She felt a little like a wraith, out of body, and an echo as she drifted through the first door on their left after Lee.
Zane was already inside and waiting on them, his golden-brown face even more drawn than usual this morning.
“Hey,” Lee said quickly, clearing his throat, as they came up to the long table. She and Zane just nodded at each other.
But unlike the last time they’d been here, they didn’t fan out, staking space or sides for themselves. Today the three of them stood huddled at the head.
So much was hinging on how they played these next few days. One wrong move, and they’d be packing their bags. Another wrong move, and they would condemn an entire group of people. Not to mention, re-sentencing their galaxy to a hopeless destruction by dark rays. There were no wins here—only chances and what they made of them.
Zane and Lee were murmuring softly over the pros and cons of omitting certain details from their reports when Whistler crossed into the PARC, hair neatly braided back behind his head. Brushing past Zane and Lee, she pulled Whistler in tightly for a hug. “Thanks for keeping us updated on Starla.”
“I always look out for my girls.”
Lee was very deliberately running a hand through his hair when she rejoined him and Zane, Whistler also coming over to complete their quadrant.
“What did I miss?” Whistler asked, no sign of his signature crooked grin, as he glanced from she to Lee and Zane.
“Not much.” Lee blew out a breath. We’re trying to figure out how much to say about Segura.”
Kat read the kaleidoscope of emotion that rippled across Whistler’s face at his words. The chills that skated over her once again. Had they really been out there not three days prior?
“So much to say and nowhere to begin,” Zane murmured.
“How have you guys been holding up? Have you heard from anyone?” Lee asked.
“I checked in on Jed and Hanna when I was doing their health surveys,” Zane admitted. “Vital signs are strong.”
