“Don’t you dare let me go. There’s no place else I would rather be.” Her hand snakes up to my face, and she cups my cheek. “Take whatever you need from me today.”
“I just need you to be here.” Looking into her loving blue eyes like this, I’m not sure how I would have done this without her by my side for the last three years.
After the doctors told us there was nothing else they could do for Jarrett, I went back to St. Louis, but everything had changed. Not just life without my brother and best friend, or the crater-sized hole in my heart left behind, the Commanders’ organization refused to answer questions about what happened that night. It created an unmendable rift that ended in my trade.
Things didn’t get easier when the police couldn’t find any information and claimed it was just an unfortunate accident. I refused to accept that. I could feel in my soul that they were wrong, so I hired Rich at the recommendation of the lead detective in Miami. Like me, he thought there was more to the story, but they were at a dead end and no one was willing to talk. His minor league teammates claimed they didn’t know what Jarrett’s plans were that night—not Miller, who was traveling with the team for rehab, and not Coach Becker, who got the call from the hospital.
The cab driver who took him to the hospital wasn’t any help either. He was called to the address for a pickup but found Jarrett instead. The number that called the taxi company was untraceable because of the volume of calls and the fact that the caller took steps to block the number.
“Cruz, did you hear me?” Pillowy lips along my jaw pull me from my thoughts. Fuck, I need a distraction. I shift in bed, sitting up against the headboard.
“No. Sorry, what were you saying?” Delilah frowns at me, her brow creased with concern.
“After the game, do you think you’ll be up for the sunset boat ride with Poppy and Hendrix? We found a local marina that rents out boats.”
“Yeah. I was just thinking I needed something to take my mind off things, and that sounds perfect.” I promised Jarrett I would live my life to its fullest, that I wouldn’t let his death break me. Spending time with friends was what he loved the most outside the ballpark and family.
Delilah settles into my lap and drops tender kisses along the side of my neck. “Maybe I can offer you another distraction in the meantime. How long before you have to get to the stadium for strength and conditioning?”
“It doesn’t matter. I’ll make time for whatever you have in mind.” It’ll be worth getting fined if I’m late. Her fingers grip my biceps desperately as she slants her lips over mine. Kissing me with everything she has right from the start.
I return the kiss with a matched need. She’s offering herself up as a distraction and I’m going to fucking drown myself in her because both of us know she is so much more than that.
Wait, does she know that?
“Delilah, hold on for a second,” I mumble against her lips. It takes effort to pull myself away, but I need to say this because I swore I wouldn’t hold back.
“Yeah, I don’t want to do that.” Her voice is husky as she kisses down my neck again.
Oh, fuck, give me strength.
“Hermosa. One second,please.” Her lips stay connected to where she was kissing her way across my sternum, but she tilts her head up, pausing her progress. “Don’t get me wrong, stopping you right now is painful. I just need—” Kiss. Taking a deep breath, I tug at her shoulder, trying not to laugh as she pouts when I move her back up my body. “You’re not making this easy.”
“I’m trying to beveryeasy.” Delilah flutters her eyelashes at me, and I have to stifle my laughter. “Fine, out with it,” she finally grumbles, resting her head against my shoulder and giving in.
“I told my brother I would always live in a way that made him proud and part of that means telling the people in my life what they mean to me. I need you to know you’re not just a distraction to me.”
“Cruz, I know that.”
I shake my head, not quite finished. “It’s been three years and you’ve been there helping me through it for most of that time. I was at my lowest point when I met you and, piece by shattered piece, you helped me to rebuild my life. You didn’t even know you were doing it. You did it by just being you.” I push a strand of hair away from her face so I can see her eyes. “He would have loved you, Delilah. The two of you would have been insufferable together, ganging up on me, but God, I would give anything for just one day of that, for him to know you. You’re not a distraction, Mi Cielo. You’re everything.”
My thumb swipes across her cheek, catching a tear that I’m not sure she even realized had fallen.
“Is it my turn to talk? Although I’m not sure I want to follow that. Talk about sweeping a girl off her feet.” Her nervous chuckle makes me smile.
“Sure, but you know you don’t have to. I didn’t tell you that because I expected anything in return. I just couldn’t keep it in, not today.”
“Cruz, shut up for a second. Please.” She has the nerve to roll those big blue eyes at me and it has the same effect as when she bites that damn lip.
My fingers slide across my lips as I flatten them into a line. When she seems satisfied that I’m done, she lifts her head, so she’s looking right at me. Her hand wraps around the base of my skull and stops when her fingers are threaded through my hair.
“I think sometimes you forget all the ways you’ve helped me over the years. When I was lost and broken after—everything—you protected me. From myself. Fromthemthat day at lunch. You refused to let me feel worthless after they betrayed me. Without you, it would have destroyed me. You showed me all the things I deserve.” She rests her forehead against mine. “Being with you still scares the shit out of me. I can’t fathom how much it would hurt to lose this, but as much as I try, I can’t deny it. I want to keep being your everything, just don’t break me because there will be no one to pick up the pieces.”
“Never, Delilah.”
She brings her mouth to mine, picking up right where she left off.
“What a fucking bomb!” Hendrix shouts, slapping me on the back when he joins me in the dugout in the ninth inning. “He’d be proud of you. You’re one hell of a teammate and captain. Not to mention you carry him with you every day with your passion for the game and your devotion to your friends.”
