“Mommy dearest. She said I couldn’t be in heaven, so living with my father was the only option.”
He tilted his head and huffed out a pissed off laugh. “I guess it’s never too late in life to quit your religion, huh? Fuck that bitch.”
I mirrored his head tilt, a little surprised by the statement. “Did you actually worship my mother?”
“Sure, as much as the other gods. I went to temple. I prayed. I kept the faith.” He kicked a rock, staring at the ground.
“Fuck, I’m sorry, Theo. I didn’t mean to ruin that for you. Maybe the other gods are better? Who’s to say they’re all like her?”
He looked up, a placating smile on his lips. “I have something else in mind for worship these days. Now eat your breakfast. We gotta get you back to Nurghle.”
Standing was harder than expected. My knees trembled, and I was practically numb between the thighs. What the fuck hadthis man done to me? I held his offered hand as I got to my feet, wondering how I would walk however many miles uphill now. If I thought my strength was giving out yesterday…
“Up you go,” Theo said, his four arms snatching me from my wobbly legs and holding me against his chest.
I yelped in surprise. “No, no! I can totally walk!”
“I can’t tell you how offensive that would be to me,” Theo replied, beginning his incline up the slope.
“That I can walk?”
“There’s an expectation that after being intimate with a Quadmos, you’re ruined the next morning. Hence, the culture of aftercare. If you were capable of hiking after last night, I’d have to hang up my horns, darling.”
“We didn’t even have sex, though.”
Theo tucked his chin down to lock his walnut gaze with mine. “You’re right. When we do, it’ll bemuchmore intense.”
He blinked, as if surprised by his own words, and immediately broke our eye contact.
The word “when” hung between us. Was this a thing now? Sure, he’d made some banter about my drink bargaining over breakfast, but this felt more like an inevitability. A promise.
I summoned all my courage and confidence. “Well—when, we do, I’ll be sure to report back on how it compares.”
A toothy grin spread on his face, although he avoided looking down at me. No response.
I reflected on his normal, rounded-looking teeth compared to last night. “So, that was what a feral Quadmos looks like, huh?”
“Some of my feral features. But not all.”
“When do I get to see you in all your glory, then? I’m dying of curiosity over here.”
“That version is a bit more beastly than most of us like to be seen.”
I traced a finger along a white line of scar tissue running down the forearm that cradled my shoulder. “One of these days, I want you to tell me the stories behind your scars. And change into a full monster. And then you’ll see that I stand my ground for what I love.”
Love. Was that what I was feeling? No. No way. What would I even have to compare it to? My cat? My flat in New York? Ida? There weren’t many things I’dlovedover the course of my life. Call it mommy or daddy issues; I didn’t form bonds. That said, I could melt into the vibrations of Theo’s chest when he spoke. Live within his ribcage along with his heart of gold. I knew what I thought about him as a person would survive anything he could possibly tell or show me. He may be protecting me from the monsters lurking in the woods, but I could protect him from his own sense of self. If his internal monologue told him he was a monstrous killing machine, then he was agoodone.
He hummed. “You’ll soon realize, I shield what I love from shit like that.”
There it was again.Love.
“You think I’m too fragile?”
“No, not fragile. Worth sheltering.”
I heard the pattering of rain on the branches above before it dripped down my cheeks. Theo hunched his shoulders over me as best he could and cupped a hand over my eyes.
“Speaking of sheltering you, I’m getting started on your cabin the moment we get to your field. Do you want it by the alcove?”
