She shook her head. "It's not that. On another day, I'd love to have lunch with you. But today…" She looked away. "I just need Zia."
"I get it. It's not a problem." He started the engine. "Let's get you back to her."
Chapter Six
Alara stared out the windshield as Reaves drove them back to the estate. She felt bad for him. She'd hardly spoken to him since she came out of Dr. Ambrose's office. She just couldn't find the words. She didn't know what to think, so how was she supposed to know what to say? But that wasn't fair, and she knew it. Reaves had been so good to her, and he was so worried. When he'd told her that she was scaring him, she'd been on the verge of telling him everything. And now she was grateful that the server had interrupted them.
If the results from the bloodwork came back confirming what she feared, she was going to have to figure out what to do. Reaves didn't need to carry that kind of burden with her. It wouldn't be fair to him.
Her thoughts seemed to alternate between swirling madly and freezing into horrified stillness. All she knew for certain was that she needed to get back to Zia. She needed to take care of her daughter.
She pressed her lips together. She needed tobe aroundto take care of her daughter.
What Grady had said about Zia going over to their place if she needed them had simply been a kind offer. But she hadn’t been able to stop herself from making the connection. If the worst-case scenario were to come true, she'd need to find someone to take care of Zia. And not just for an afternoon here and there.
She shuddered at the thought. No. She couldn't go near it.
Reaves shot her a quick glance. "Are you cold? Do you want me to put the heater on?"
"No, I'm fine. It's not that."
She knew why he pursed his lips—she'd gone and used that same word again. Fine. She hadn't meant to. But she could see how it must feel like an insult. He'd done so much for her, and all she was giving him was that one four-letter word that meant nothing.
"Are you sure you don't want to talk?"
Want? Of course she wanted to. But it wasn't his burden to carry. He was already doing far more than he needed to for her and Zia. And that reminded her…
"As a matter of fact, there is something I want to say to you."
He glanced over at her again, his eyes wide this time.
She smiled. "Don't look so worried. What I mean is that I want to thank you."
"There's no need."
"You don't even know what for yet."
He gave her a rueful smile. "Okay. Sorry. Go ahead."
"I know you told Ollie and Callie about my appointment."
He cringed. "Yeah. Sorry. I…"
"No, Reaves, please don't apologize. What I'm trying to say is thank you."
"Yeah?"
"Yes. Seriously." She smiled. "Well, maybe not thank you for telling them. But I know why you had to."
"Ah. Yeah. Right."
"It's okay. I'm not mad at you. Just a little surprised. You said that you weren't working today."
"I know. And…" He let out a short laugh. "Damn, Alara. I want to tell you that I’d never lie to you, but… that'd be a lie, wouldn't it? I try to be as honest as I can. But in this case, I figured I'd tell a white lie. I knew that it'd be easy enough for me to get out of the flight—knew it wouldn't make any difference to Ollie, or to Elliott, who's covering for me. But I also knew that it would make a difference to you if I told you I was supposed to be flying. You wouldn't have agreed to let me come with you, would you?"
"No."
The silence dragged on for a few moments. And just before he reached the gates at the entrance to the estate, she rested her hand on his arm briefly.
