“Have you thought about quitting?” she asked.
Daniel pushed out his bottom lip and looked at her through his lashes. “Are you trying to get rid of me? Do our hours together each month bore you now?”
Her melodious laugh rang out between them as she shook her head. “Goodness, no. I can’t tell you how much I’ve neededyou the past year and a half. It sounds so silly, but I’m not sure I could have gotten through everything without this.”
He dropped the act and reached out to grab her hand. “Not silly. That asshole beat you down for years and left you with nothing. You were alone and needed someone outside the situation to talk to.”
“Yes, and you were there for me and gave me what I needed. I wonder if you are getting what you need though. I’m crossing boundaries, I know, and you can tell me to mind my business.” She pushed her hair behind her ears and adjusted her position on the couch. “It seems like you’ve found someone that makes you happy, and he sounds like a good guy. I think we both know how rare that is. Are you really okay with risking that for this job?”
Putting his cool drink to his overheated forehead, Daniel sighed. “He’s fine with my job.”
They’d talked about it ad nauseam while cuddled together in bed. Jensen had assured him over and over again he wouldn’t interfere with his job and cared more that Daniel had food to eat than being monogamous in that area. He’d also promised to support Daniel if he chose to get a new job and would be willing to foot bills if needed. Not that Daniel really trusted in that. Sure, he believed Jensen believed his own words. But it didn’t matter because Daniel wasn’t going to let himself become a burden. He’d figure it out without relying on Jensen to cover his ass.
“Are you fine with it?” Kassandra asked. “From our first appointment, you’ve pushed me to demand what I want out of life. You told me my current state isn’t permanent and I deserved every good thing I wanted. And, listen, I know you said all those things because I was paying you to, but they weren’t lies. They apply to you too.”
“No, but it’s a little more complicated than that. I can’t just quit.”
“What do you mean you can’t quit?” Anger flashed on Kassandra’s pretty face as she shot up from the couch. “I thought this place was consensual. I didn’t know they were forcing you to be here.”
“No, no!” Daniel scrambled to set down his drink and stop her from running out the door, presumably to call the police and any other group of people that could save him. “No one is forcing me to do this. I could leave at any time, but I need the job.”
She shifted her weight from foot to foot, still looking unsure. “I could try helping you get out if you’re here against your will.”
“No.” Fuck, he didn’t want to tell her this. It was unprofessional and made him look like a fucking idiot. And that look was not good for business. After tonight, he was certain he’d never see her again, not with how badly he’d fumbled this conversation. God, he was supposed to be sexy and supportive, not pathetic. Hopefully she didn’t complain to Lucinda after the appointment was over. “I need the money, Kass. It’s the only way I can keep my bills paid.”
“I have a friend that’s looking to hire someone, and I can keep an eye on the job boards at the company I work for. There has to be other things you could do.”
Despite the depressing conversation, his heart did warm at her offer. “I have a lot of bills. It’s not as simple as sending out a résumé.”
She shook her head. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be prying into your life. How about we call it an early night?”
“Yeah, sure,” he said, his heart sinking. She was his easiest client, and he’d managed to completely fuck the night up. “I can refund you.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’ve earned it in my eyes.”
Daniel slumped back on the couch, feeling shittier than a hangover at drag brunch in June. He should have just kept his mouth shut about Jensen and money. He’d been doing this toolong to be so dumb. It was like rule number three of the trade to never talk about real life. People paid for a fantasy, and Daniel had delivered a nightmare.
“Daniel?” Kassandra spoke as she reached the door.
He popped his head up to look at her.
“Fuck money. I know we need it to survive, but we can’t thrive if we spend our lives chasing it. I’m not sure what’s going on that makes you need it so badly, but I can say you’ve never looked happy when I hand you cash. You did look happy when you were talking about your man though. There has to be some middle ground where you can pay your bills and get out of this work. Life is too short to be miserable.”
The money in his pocket felt even worse. He wanted to throw it at Kassandra like some sort of Frankenstein of a stripper and therapist. He didn’t deserve his hourly fee, and he definitely didn’t deserve the large tip she always included. There was nothing he could say as she turned around and left the room, taking some of the air with her.
What did she expect him to do? What did everyone expect him to do? Just forget about his monthly payments? He could go back to paying only the minimums, but then they would never be paid off. If he quit, he would never be free of debt. He could never start living the life he wanted. What a privileged world they all lived in where money just appeared when needed and people could be relied on to help.
He scoffed. Who would even hire him if he did leave? Kassandra and Jensen were delusional if they thought he could just walk his way into a job that paid more than minimum wage. Any job that would hire him would make him homeless by the end of the year. Maybe if he overloaded his schedule, worked seven days a week, he could build up enough savings to find a new job then work up a corporate ladder.
It felt like a light bulb went off in his head.
That was it. That was the way out of this. He jumped up from the couch and basically ran to the door. He’d talk to Lucinda and ask for more work. More hours. More clients. He’d take every single person that walked into the Lillian. He’d sleep in one of the rooms so he could be available twenty-four hours a day.
By the time Jensen moved to the city, he’d have money saved up he could use for loan payments while he settled into something new. And when that buffer ran out, then he’d figure something else out. He always figured something out.
Daniel knocked on the door, the thick feel of the wood familiar against his skin. He’d been in the outdated office Jensen would no doubt love at least once a week since he started at the Lillian. At first it was just to get his schedule and check in with Lucinda. She liked to know about how business was going. Liked to know if they were getting pushed around or if they were sitting on their thumbs, bored, too often.
Daniel had no idea what it took to run the operation or how she advertised or really anything outside the hotel rooms. But they’d always had a steady flow of customers and no police raids, so he imagined she knew what she was doing.
