“Have you guys been planning a family for long?”
Vanessa laughs, but in a self-deprecating way. “We thought we’d never be able to have kids. And then wham, out of the blue, it happened.”
“Is Haruto happy?”
“Of course—why do you ask?”
“No reason.” Then, as if struck by some need to tell a truth, or perhaps it’s the wine after not having had alcohol for so many months, Daisy says, “Sometimes I wonder if Jon and I—I mean, Iknowwe’re doing the right thing having a baby, but I do wonder if Jon really wants it.”
“Seriously?”
She nods.
“Has he expressed regret?” Vanessa tops up their wine.
Daisy breathes in deeply and exhales. She explains that Jon suddenly has unanticipated competition for the job they thought was guaranteed to him. And it’s rocked their plans.
“Part of me wonders if Jon only said yes to getting pregnant because of the whole job-offer deal,” Daisy says, reaching for her newly full glass.
“You don’t mean that?”
“Well, he knows thatIbelieve a baby would be healthy for our marriage, and that becoming a family unit would make me happy. And he knows that if I am happy, my parents are happy, and my dad is the one who offered Jon the promotion, so...” Daisy’s voice fades. She clears her throat. “So maybe he just went along with it.”
Quietly, Vanessa says, “I didn’t know your marriage was in trouble.”
“I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“What went wrong?”
Daisy feels a darkness beginning to descend. The wind blows a little harder, and a cloud crosses the sun. “I...I think I’ve had a bit too much wine. I feel a bit odd, to be honest. Sort of woozy.”
“I’ll get you some water.”
Vanessa hurries back into her house and returns with a jug of ice water and clean glasses. She pours Daisy a glass.
Daisy swallows half her water, but it doesn’t seem to clear her head. A movement in the upstairs window next door catches her eye. She turns and notices that a woman in a wheelchair is watching them from a corner. Vanessa is sitting with her back to the woman, so she probably can’t see her. Daisy feels strange, like things are closing in even tighter. She glances up into the sky. The clouds are thickening. That ragged murder of crows is still circling like little black buzzards.
“Daisy?”
“What?”
“You were telling me you thought a baby would fix your marriage.”
Daisy rubs her brow, trying to focus. The cold wind blows even harder, whipping up the edge of the tablecloth, but she feels hot, sweaty. “I—Jon screwed up in Colorado. He did something stupid. I...I had to clean up after him both times.”
“What do you mean?”
“I—it’s nothing. The women—they accused him of stuff. Took it all out of proportion. They were seeking attention. I helped clean it up without his knowledge.”
Vanessa’s gaze turns intense. It makes Daisy feel scared. She’s crossed a line. She shouldn’t have said this.
“Are you able to share what happened?” Vanessa asks quietly.
“It’s like you said. Those A-type male personalities. He just made a mistake. Boys do what boys do—it’s so hard growing up male these days.”
“What kind of mistake?”
Daisy swallows, struggling to pull clarity back into her brain, but she feels as though she’s sliding deeper into some kind of trap of her own making, and she can’t back out now that she’s baited her friend’s curiosity. She attempts a dismissive wave of her hand and says, “Oh, the first incident was forever ago—he was basically a teenager. The other was in Colorado, and it was definitely a manufactured accusation andnot Jon’s fault. These two women—for whatever their reasons—they tried to destroy his life.”
