He grimaces. “Fine. But I did have feelings for you. I did care, Julie. Then my father married Caroline and everything changed. He was holding my future over my head. I blamed you for that.”
“Be serious, Asher. We started as a lie," I say quietly. "So whatever feelings you thought you had were created within the lie. Not the reality."
He flinches. I tilt my head and stare at him for a few seconds. It’s crazy that now that I know he’s a liar, I can see it written all over him.
Asher opens his mouth. Closes it. Tries again. Then. "I'm sorry."
I hold up my hand. "I don't accept your apology. Because you aren’t sorry. Not really. You’re sorry you got caught. Sorry you don’t get everything you wanted. If this had gone another way, you’d be patting yourself on the back and running over me on the way out. You’d be gleeful about it because you’d have gotten your way. Your father was absolutely right about one thing. You're a bad man.”
He looks stunned that I’m being so direct.Good. I hope it hurts.
“I have one thing to say to you, though.”
He nods. "Okay."
I have no fucks left in me for this man’s feelings, so I’m saying what I want to. And that means I’m going to be harsh.
“Stop worrying about what your father would think and start wondering what your mother would have said instead. She loved you. Be a son she'd be proud of. Be her legacy. Not his. Because right now? You're acting like the husband who broke her heart. The one who slept with other women while she was dying. Who couldn't be bothered to be there for her. Or their child. Hewas a bad husband. And so were you. I bet she’d have been heartbroken to know her son is a fucking monster."
His face crumbles and his eyes are definitely glistening. I don’t care. "I’m done with you now, Asher. If you ever see me again, look the other way. I don’t want to know you and nothing you could ever say is necessary for me to hear.”
And now, I'm done. Jamie takes my hand immediately. Ryan moves to my other side, his presence solid and protective. We walk toward the elevator. I don't look back. The elevator doors open. We step inside.
And as the doors slide closed, I catch one last glimpse of Asher standing alone in that hallway, looking gutted, surrounded by the wreckage of everything he destroyed. I hope it hurts. But knowing him, he’ll keep right on making shitty decisions.
"Holy shit," Ryan breathes. "Julie, what the fuck just happened up there?"
"Dean left her everything and she said no thank you," Jamie says, her voice thick with emotion. "She walked away from all of it."
"Not quite all of it," I correct. "But the big thing? Yeah. I said no."
Ryan stares at me. "You what?"
"I'll explain," I say. "But not here. Not yet."
The elevator reaches the ground floor. The doors open. And I step out into the lobby, into the afternoon sunlight streaming through the glass doors, into my new life.
CHAPTER
FIFTY
JULIE
The relief lastsuntil I get into bed that night. Then, my nervous system seems to collapse. I lie awake in the guest room at the West Seattle house, staring at the ceiling, replaying every moment of the last few years. Every conversation. Every touch. Every date. Every laugh. Every time he said "I love you" and I believed him. None of it was ever real. Not one minute.
I don’t sleep for more than twenty minutes at a time. I'm barely eating. Jamie makes breakfast and I push it around my plate. Ryan brings takeout and I manage three bites before my stomach turns. Food tastes like nothing. I feel like nothing, too.
"You need to eat," Jamie says gently on day five.
"I know."
"Julie—"
"I said I know." My voice comes out sharper than I intended. "I'm sorry. I literally can't right now."
She doesn't push. But I see the worry in her eyes. On day eight, I decide I need to go back to the house.Myhouse. The one with my name on the deed. If I'm going to move forward, I need to reclaim that space. Make it mine again.
Jamie's at work, so Ryan drives me there in the late afternoon. The sun is setting over the lake, painting everything gold and pink, and for a moment—just a moment—it's beautiful. Then I walk through the front door and I can't breathe.
