"Move," I beg. "Please, Ryan, move, please fuck me.”
He does. He pulls back and thrusts in, deep and hard, and I scream again because it's so much, he's so deep, and every stroke hits exactly where I need it. He's not gentle. He's not careful. He's fucking me the way I've needed to be fucked, like he can't help himself, like he's been holding back for years and now that he has me, he's going to ruin me for anyone else.
"Is this what you need?" he asks, his voice rough against my ear. His hands grip my hips, pulling me onto him with every thrust, forcing me to take him deeper. "Tell me. Tell me how it feels."
"Amazing," I gasp, my head thrown back, my eyes squeezed shut because the sensation is overwhelming and I can feel another orgasm building already, impossibly fast. "So good, Ryan, don't stop."
"Look at me," he demands. "Julie, look at me."
I force my eyes open, and he's watching me, his jaw tight, his pupils blown wide. The connection is electric, terrifying, perfect. I can't hide from him. I can't retreat into my head. He's right here, demanding everything, taking everything, and I'm giving it because I can't not.
"You're so fucking sexy taking my dick, Julie. And you're going to come again," he says. It's not a question. "I can feel you. You're close. Come on my cock, baby. I want to feel you."
His words undo me. The pressure builds and builds, and then I'm coming, harder than before, my body clamping down on him as I cry out his name. He keeps fucking me through it, his thrusts getting erratic, losing rhythm, and then he's groaning, long and low, as he spills inside me, his hips stuttering, his forehead dropping to my shoulder.
For a long moment, neither of us moves. Then he rolls us over so I’m not taking his weight anymore. His hand is splayed across my back, holding me close, and I can feel the steadythrum of his heartbeat beneath my cheek, the way we're both shaking, the sweat cooling on our skin.
"That was..." I trail off, unable to find the words.
"Yeah," he says, pressing a kiss to my forehead. His voice is wrecked. "It was."
I raise my head and look at him then, and the look in his eyes makes my chest ache. There's tenderness there, but also satisfaction. Possession, definitely. The look of a man who knows exactly what he has, and what he's going to keep.
"I love you," I say.
"I love you too, Buttercup."
We stay like that for a long time, just holding each other, and I realize something. This is what I've been searching for my whole life. Not the grand gestures or the expensive gifts or the fairy-tale romance. Just this.
Someone who sees me. Who loves me. Who makes me feel safe-and who knows exactly when I need to stop feeling safe and start feeling wrecked. Someone who feels like home.
"What are you thinking?" Ryan asks, brushing a strand of hair from my face.
"That I'm the luckiest woman in the world."
He smiles. “So my big dick made you happy?” he asks teasingly.
“Um, yeah,” I laugh. “You’re a magician or something. My body is wrecked, in a very good way.”
“Mine too, Buttercup. Never felt this good, ever.”
I curl into him, my head on his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. I'm where I’m supposed to be. Present. Happy. Thoroughly, deliciously fucked, by a man who loves me for exactly who I am.
CHAPTER
FIFTY-SIX
JULIE
I waketo the sound of rain against the window and the warm weight of Ryan's arm across my waist. Gray morning light filters through the curtains. I smile as I think back to last night and remember how incredible it was. For a moment I just lie there, cataloguing the pleasant ache in my body. Thinking about it makes me wet, and I wonder if it would be wrong to wake him up and ask for more.
Then he stirs. His lips find the back of my neck, and I feel him already hard against me. "Morning," he murmurs, and his voice is rough with sleep, low in a way that sends heat pooling straight between my thighs.
"Morning."
His hand slides down my stomach, slow and deliberate, and I press back into him instinctively. His fingers find me wet and ready, and I gasp at the contact, at how immediate it is, how my body just opens for him without hesitation.
"Already?" he breathes against my neck, and I can hear the smile in it.
