Page 93 of Vows of Silence

It was only when I switched the shower on that I stopped dead still, my head jerking back to look through the door and into the bedroom.

What the fuck was that?

Tightening the towel around my body, I stormed back into the room, snatching up the white device I had walked past.

Somehow, being in this room, things had begun to feel normal again. So when I’d registered a phone on my bedside table, it hadn’t occurred to me to think it was out of place. My oldlife and new life were merging into something that felt like my future, and so a phone hadn’t screamed “new.”

I automatically pressed my thumb to the screen and sat down on the edge of the bed when it unlocked.

Of course he had my fingerprints. Of fucking course he did!

For one horrible second, I found myself wondering how long he’d had them and what he’d used them for. But then I figured it was out of my control anyway. Whatever he’d used them for was in the past. I couldn’t change it, and clearly I hadn’t been harmed from it—it was just a major fucking violation.

I scrolled through, seeing he had programmed the same wallpaper, organised my apps into the same folders I had them in, in the same order, and even had the same widgets on the home screen. Swiping through the gallery, he’d downloaded all my photos from the cloud, logged me into my social media accounts, and input all my data back into my period tracker.

Because that wasn’t fucking obsessive at all!

The phone felt like a brick in my hand. It was only a few weeks ago that I had never been without a device. I’d taken it for granted. I’d grown up in a generation where having a mobile was as essential as clothing. And now, the weight of what this meant was immeasurable.

It was obvious that this wasn’t my actual phone—the screen didn’t have a chip in the corner from where I’d dropped it, and there wasn’t the general wear and tear of a well-used device. But it was replicated to look like mine. Silas had built this for me, app by app, picture by picture.

Only this one couldn’t be tracked and traced back to here. Not unless I reached out and made it known where I was.

Before I could think better of it, I was keying in the number for my father’s office. It was the only one I knew by heart. Who took the time to learn numbers these days when everything was programmed for us? But my father’s I knew. It was always thenumber I rang before I was assigned Frank and given my own personal driver.

My eyes blurred as memories washed over me—me drunkenly giggling, asking “Daddy darling” to pick me up. Me at eight, at my very first sleepover, whispering on the phone, telling my dad I missed him and Mum. Being spoilt on my thirteenth birthday and ringing the office to ask for a car. Spending more than my allowance, maxing out the credit card, and needing him to wire me more money.

And then, just as quickly, the warmth of those memories vanished and were replaced with my dad in his office with Adrien, signing my life away as though I meant nothing to him.

I erased the number.

You could always reach out to—

No. I silenced that thought before it could take root.

I couldn’t contact him. Not after last night.

Could I?

Luca would be beside himself with worry. He’d be hating himself—especially as he had tabs on me. He would never forgive himself for letting me go missing under his watch.

I owed it to him to reach out and let him know I was safe.

I also owed it to him to let him know what had happened. How I felt about Silas—even if I wasn’t exactly sure what those feelings were, I knew enough to know they weren’t something I should feel whilst technically involved with another man.

I climbed higher onto the bed, resting my back against the headboard, and logged onto our secret messaging app—the one Luca had built for me and him—and had a message ping through before I’d even had a chance to set my new username.

Luca:What the fuck are you doing, little ember?

Isabelle:Chilling. Killing.

I sent a GIF of the goofy ghost face fromScary Movie.

Luca:That’s not funny.

Isabelle:Have you lost your sense of humour?

Luca:Have you lost your fucking mind?