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“No, mama. There isn’t.”
“I wasn’t askin’ Elliott. I was tellin’.”
I remained quiet.
“You’ve been mopin’ around here for the past few weeks darlin’ and I wanna’ know why. You’re really starting to worry me. So, spill. Is it school?”
“No, mama. It’s not school. It’s a student at school.”
“Hmm. I’m having trouble imagining my six foot four mammoth of a son would have a problem with anyone,” she laughed.
When I didn’t say anything, she kept on.
“Well does your mama need to call his mama?” She teased, poking me in the ribs.
We both laughed.
“No, that’s okay. Seriously. It’s okay. I’m gonna’ fix it. Come Monday, come hell or high water. I’m going to fix it.”
“Well good son.” She tapped me on the leg before lifting herself off the bed. “Come on, it’s time for dinner. Oh, and Elliott? Remember, you never throw the first punch boy. That’s the rule. Just a reminder.”
“It won’t come to that mom. Trust me.”
I was beginning to scare myself. It was time to do something about my obsession.
Chapter Two
With Everything I Have
These were the days that changed my heart.
I remember it all so vividly.
Elliott Gray was hovering above me. He’s speaking to me but I’m too mortified by the fact that I’ve run into my mom’s best friend and my math teacher, then slipped on the worksheets she was carrying, to listen.
Not to mention the fact that there is some freaky things happening between the two of us that I just can’t seem to put my finger on. He is affecting me and I never asked him to do this. I’m losing control. I never lose control.
“Huh?” I intelligently ask.
“I said, you should do shampoo commercials, Jules,” he teases, holding out his hand.
“Yeah. Right,” I say, refusing his hand. That was rude. Dang it, I hate being impolite. I’m better than that, even if it is Elliott Gray. “Thanks for the compliment, though.” There, remedied that little issue.
Suddenly, I remember that Mrs. Kitt was cleaning up a mess that I helped make, by herself.
“I’m so sorry Mrs. Kitt! I wasn’t paying attention and........”
I knelt down and began gathering the loose worksheets. Elliott Gray helps me but I don’t think he’s paying attention to his task because he’s just pooling them into a disheveled pile at his knees. I avoid eye contact, hoping not to catch his unbelievably blue eyes because I’ll betray myself if I do that. I just know I’d end up smiling like the dope I am if those eyes met mine.
You don’t like him Julia Jacobs. You haven’t suddenly developed a crush on your childhood friend. This is Elliott Gray. He used to shove tadpoles down your shirt when you were little. He denied your existence in junior high, breaking your heart. He’s well-liked and you’re, well, hated by almost everyone here. Ha!
I try not to remember how badly he broke my heart all those years ago. Later, stupidly much later, I realized that the blinding pain that resided in my chest at the time was caused by his absence. I even went so far as to ask mom to make a doctor’s appointment for me, that’s how painful it was. She didn't. I shudder to think. That would have been embarrassing. I never fully recovered by the way. It’s a pathetic thing to admit but I can’t lie to myself no matter how badly I want to.
I reach for a worksheet but Elliott’s hands sweep toward mine so quickly I don’t have time to pull away. When our fingers brush, a sparkling flash of warmth instantly relaxes me. My eyes begin to droop in sleep. The blazing electricity dances around our bodies and climbs the walls around us. I yank my hand from his and the anxiety I was feeling fills my chest again but with it brought a new sensation, fear.
We sit and stare at one another. Explain. Tell me it’s nothing, I silently plea. I begin to open my mouth to ask him what happened but instead Mrs. Kitt asks us to return to our seats. I peer over my shoulder and notice the entire class is trying to read our silent expressions. When we stand, the class shouts in laughs and taunts. I’m scared out of my mind. I know he’s going to want to talk to me after class but I cannot let this happen. I cannot let him near me.
When the bell rings, I gather my books and haul towards the door. He chases me.
