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“No, not long,” he says. He smiles at me, but then he frowns.
“Is something wrong? Did Ozzy yell at you today? Oh, God. Please tell me my father didn’t show up at your work? He didn’t text me all day. Not that he usually texts me, but you know. I didn’t see him this morning and…” Ryker is just staring at me. “I’m rambling, sorry. What’s up?”
“Aria,” he says, taking my hand.
“What?” I ask, my heart starting to beat fast.
“You can’t stay with me.”
“What? Why not?”
“Just listen, OK? You’re eighteen. You have high school graduation coming, and a whole summer before you start college in the fall—“
“So?” I say. Too loudly. “So what? I don’t care about graduation. I don’t care about any of it.”
“That’s my point. When we started this—when I started this—I didn’t want to take over your life. I didn’t want to change everything and rip it all apart.”
“You’re not!” I say. “You’re not. I want this too, Ryker. I do.”
“I know you do, Aria. I want it as well. But just… not like this.”
“Not like what? What’s changed? We were happy this morning.”
“Yeah, and then I realized… well, I realized that taking you away from your family is the wrong way to start something real. You can’t stay at my house. You have to go home. We have to sort this out and either your parents are on board, or we’ll…”
“No,” I say. “They don’t get to make this decision, I do. We do,” I say, taking both his hands. “I’m eighteen now. It’s my life.”
“I know,” he says. “That’s how I felt at eighteen.”
“And you moved away. Everyone moves away. This is how things are done.”
“Yeah, but you don’t understand why I moved away, Aria. No one wants to leave the way I did, and if I take you now. If I let you move in and we seal the deal before we’re ready—“
“We’re ready,” I say, becoming desperate.
But he shakes his head at me. Then he lets go of my hands, puts the car in gear and pulls away from my school. “We’re not ready, Aria. We barely just got to know each other. Things are going too fast and I feel like we’re skipping steps.”
“Well, I don’t feel like we’re skipping steps.”
He gives me a side-eyed look. “You don’t actually know what the steps are.”
“That was mean,” I say.
“I’m not trying to be mean.”
“Then what are you trying to do?”
He doesn’t say anything for a few moments.
“Oh, my God. Are you breaking up with me?”
“No,” he says, getting on the highway that leads to my parents’ house.
“Well, you’re taking me home.”
“I’m not breaking up with you. Not exactly.”
“Ryker,” I say, starting to get pissed. “Explain. Tell me what the hell is going on.”
“I just did, Aria. You’re not listening to me. I’m taking you home and we’re going to talk to your parents and see if they’ll see things our way.”
“And if not?” I ask.
“If not…” He sighs. “If not then we’ll have to put this on hold.”
“Is this about the deal?” I ask.
He points a finger at me. “Don’t you dare. I’m doing this for you. For us. Not that deal or the money. So just don’t even think that.”
“I don’t want to go home. Just take me to my sister’s house then.”
He looks at me, then back at the road. “Either we go to your house and have a conversation about this and respect your parents’ wishes, or you break up with me. So which way does this go, Aria? It’s up to you.”
“You’re serious?”
“Dead serious.”
I lean back in my seat and cross my arms, so pissed off. “Why do you get to make all these decisions? Why don’t I get a say?”
“You do get a say. You either do it my way and give us a real chance to make this work or you break it off with me. Because those are my terms.”
“Those aren’t terms!” I shout. “That’s an ultimatum!”
“You can think of it that way if you want. But that’s not how I see it.”
“What if I give you an ultimatum?”
“That’s your prerogative.”
“Nice,” I huff. “Real nice.”
He sighs, then takes my hand again. “Just… give me a chance to make it right, OK? Just trust me, Aria. If I ruin your relationship with your family you will resent me for as long as we’re together. It might not happen right away, but it will happen. And I can’t live with myself if I do that.”
I pull my hand away from his, so angry right now. I feel like I did that day back in the Corinthian hotel restaurant when he ordered me grilled cheese. Like a stupid child.
I take deep breaths as we drive, trying my best not to sigh on the exhale and huff and puff like I’m having my own silent tantrum.
