Page 23 of If I Stopped Haunting You

“Maybe I didn’t want it! Maybe it wasn’t me!”

“What?”

They stared at each other for a long, heated moment. Neil could feel his pulse in his fingertips as his chest rose and fell with each breath.

He’d just admitted his biggest worry. That he never wanted this, any of this. He wanted to write. He wanted people to read his books. Neil Storm had wanted so many things, theusualthings, but he never meant for any of it to get this far. He never meant to lose sight of his goals and aspirations.

He never meant to hurt her.

“Excuse me?” she panted when he said nothing more.

“Maybe I didn’t want it,” he repeated. “Maybe I made a lot of bad decisions when I was younger, and now I don’t know what to do or where to go. I don’t have as much power as you think I do, Skinner.”

Skinner opened her mouth to respond, brow furrowed in confusion.

“Thought we heard bickering,” Daniela drawled.

Heart in his throat, Neil took a staggering step away from Skinner as if she’d burned him, turning in surprise to where Laszlo and Daniela had appeared in the entry to the study. Laszlo’s lips twisted into a frown as he took in the scene.

“Cough it up,” Daniela said, motioning to Laszlo.

Laszlo produced a small bill, slapping it into Daniela’s palm as he mouthed,Sorry.

“Youbeton us?” Skinner spat.

“It’s not that big of a deal,” Daniela said with a shrug, sauntering into the study. “You two are just predictable.”

“Are not,” they said in unison.

Neil and Skinner turned toward each other, his fury reflected in her expression.

“Case in point,” Daniela slurred. Her eyes flew to the liquorcabinet, hands clasping together. “Oh, you managed to unlock it!” She headed toward it, Neil and Skinner’s bickering already forgotten. Neil stepped back as he motioned to the doors behind Skinner.

“By all means.”

“Looks more like they removed the doors,” Laszlo said with a pointed look.

Neil swept his arm to the cabinet, holding up his glass. “Yes, yes we did. It’s not cheating, and it clearly isn’t being used. We opened a bottle of whiskey, but there’s plenty there.”

Daniela lifted and sniffed the bottle, grimacing. “I don’t know how you two can stomach it.” She coughed, holding the bottle out of reach.

Skinner shook her head as she pried the bottle from Daniela’s grasp.

“You get used to it.”

Chapter 8

NEIL

Giddy excitement crept into Neil’s bloodstream at her words, flooding him with warmth.You get used to it.As ifhewere someone to get used to.

He shook himself, snuffing out a smile as his fingers tightened around his glass as the others surrounded the cabinet and Skinner. Neil pivoted and crossed to the fireplace, taking a swig of his whiskey as he strode away from them, as far as he could possibly go in this large room.

Distance, he needed distance from her.

The whiskey was strong, the harsh fumes racing down his throat and lighting his insides. Coughing, he pounded a fist against his chest, eyes watering as he set aside the glass, knelt, and reached for some firewood.

Neil could do this. Neil could focus on something else, keep his hands and his mind preoccupied for a few minutes. Working with his hands always seemed to calm him; he wasn’t meant to sit still for long. Even when he wrote, he did it in twenty-minute intervals, too antsy to stay seated for any longer.