Page 71 of The Pakhan's Secret Baby

"Rashid, I can't just?—"

I tilt her chin up and kiss her with hunger in it so she understands what I want, but she pulls back.

"I can't do this," she says, stepping away from me.

"Why not?"

The warmth from the other night is gone and she's cold, but there's a look of disappointment in her eyes that pains me. Coming home soaked in blood isn't something new to me. Whether it's mine or someone else's, it happens more often than not. This is the life I live, and she has to understand that.

"I'm going to bed. Don't go into that room until you've showered and changed. Do you understand me?" Her tone is starting to resemble my mother’s, and I’m not sure I like it.

"You're being unreasonable," I growl, but she keeps walking and doesn't look back. When she gets to my room she shuts the door behind her, and that's that.

Is she insane? She expects me to tiptoe around her now? And for what? That boy is going to take over my empire when he's old enough.

Fuck's sake.

I want this woman more than ever, and she's going to make it impossible to prove myself. There will be hurdles to navigate and hoops to jump through. And my gut tells me this is only the beginning.

I think I screwed up by not showering before seeing her, and I think she's going to make my life miserable for a while now.

25

EMORY

I'm curled up on the bed with my eyes shut when Rashid stomps in almost thirty minutes later. I peek at him, but he doesn't turn toward me at all. I can tell by the slump of his shoulders that he's not happy, probably because I rejected him. But seeing that blood shocked me. And he walked right into Lex's room where my tiny toddler could be exposed to his violent job. I get that he is a criminal and he has difficult tasks, but he can't do that.

The past month has felt like a tornado hit my life, and if it feels like an upheaval to me, I can only imagine how Lex feels. He's just a baby; he hardly understands meeting one new person, let alone several at a time, along with his entire environment shifting and changing around him.

Rashid stalks into the bathroom after removing his shirt and slacks, leaving his boots by the door like normal, and I listen to the water turn on. My eyes land on the pile of clothing across the room, by the armchair he sits in to put his shoes on in the morning. It's got blood across the chest where I noticed it before, but there is also blood along the sleeve, which I hadn't noticed thanks to his suit coat.

Guilt wraps around my heart like barbed wire as I realize I was so protective of Lex, who was sleeping and saw nothing, that I completely ignored the fact that Rashid was covered in blood. I took for granted that it was someone else's blood and never stopped to think that maybe Rashid was injured. And now I feel like a fool.

He reached for me for comfort, and though it meant sex and connection, I pushed him away. What if he got shot and I just rejected him? No matter what the man has done, we do share some sort of bond now, and that was a horrible thing for me to do to him.

I lay there with the weight of guilt crushing me for a few minutes, and then decide I have to go check on him and see if he's hurt. My father trusted this man and his power enough to purposefully provoke him just to get me away from the Gusevs. It was a despicable move on Batya's part, but Rashid has done exactly what Batya hoped. I am safe, and so is Lex. In fact, so is Batya, which I'm sure wasn't part of his plan at all. The least I can do is be a kind human.

Sliding off the bed, I creep over to the door and peek in. Rashid stands in the shower under the flow, washing his arm. The glass is fogged, but even through the steam I can see what looks like a laceration across his bicep. I watch him for a second, admiring his strength, but he looks up and sees me.

His scowl isn't exactly inviting, but I mumble, "I'm sorry... I wanted to check on you. Are you hurt?"

Instead of answering me, he slides the glass door open and continues washing his body. I'm not sure if it's an invitation, but I walk closer, leaning around the shower door to see the woundon his arm. It's not deep at all—it probably had already scabbed by the time he got home—but it's angry.

"Is it bad?" I ask softly.

"Nothing a little TLC can't fix." He reaches for me, extending a soapy hand toward me, and as much as I'm not in the mood for sex right now, I know he is. Me just walking in here in my t-shirt and shorts has made him start to swell. Besides, I know how generous of a lover this man is, and if he can't get me in the mood then there's something wrong with me.

I strip off my clothes and toss them in the hamper, then step into the shower, and Rashid gives me no time to adjust to the temperature. He pulls me under the flow and kisses me hard, grabbing my ass to grind his pelvis against mine. I return the kiss and drape my arms around his shoulders, careful to avoid his injury.

"You changed your mind?" he growls, nipping at my neck.

"I felt bad... I'm sorry for snapping at you." He attacks my neck with kissing and sucking, greedily groping me all over as the water soaks my hair and sluices over my curves.

"Don't be," he mumbles, before sucking a nipple into his mouth. He swirls his tongue around it and lets it go with a wet pop before he says, "You're right. Aleksander should be at least fifteen before he sees the darker side of my business."

Fifteen is still young in my mind, but at least he's getting the point. I feel a smile tug at my mouth as he curls his fingers around my neck and tries to kiss me again. But I put a finger over his eager lips and say, "We have to discuss that—at a later date."

When he sucks my finger into his mouth I get the point. He's too hungry for me to wait anymore. I stroke him, allowing him to kiss me and suck my lip into his mouth, and when he growls I find myself feeling eager to please him. He usually takes such good care of me, that I want to do that for him.