Page 191 of While You Were Trending

I know the dangers of trusting it.

But I’m not who I used to be.

I’m stronger.

Smarter.

And I’m with a man who doesn’t need me to perform to be lovable.

“His singing voice is terrible,” I say to Zander and Lou, hoping the lie can calm my flaming nerves and distract me from the panic building inside me at the idea that I want to let myself fall in love with Declan.

That I want to ask him to stay.

I couldn’t promise him I won’t get neurotic and scared that he doesn’t really see me or love me back.

But he knows me. He’ll know I’m scared.

And if he—if he wants me back, he’ll love me through it.

“Are you insane?” Zander says to me while Lou gasps. “He sings better than Waverly Sweet and Bro Code and Half-Cocked Heroes put together. He could be the entire Vienna Boys’ Choir all by himself. If the world ran out of harps, they’d ask Declan to be the harp instead.”

Lou snorts at me. “Don’t mock the voice. I like you, but the voice is off-limits.”

“Just testing you to make sure you actually like him.” I make myself grin at them like my heart isn’t racing and the little voice that tells me to do bad things isn’t whisperinglet yourself fall in love.

Zander squints at me. “Are you okay?”

“Is a woman in denial ever okay?” Lou mutters.

Heat flushes my cheeks.

I busy myself with grabbing the micellar water, and I snatch the makeup removal rag without touching Declan’s fingers.

He rests a hand on my knee.

I jerk my eyes up to meet his gaze, and that soft smile, those crinkling eyes, the gentle squeeze of my knee—I’m okay.

I am.

He knows me.

The ugly parts of me.

The panicked parts of me.

The beautiful parts of me.

And he loves me.

He’s never said the words, but the bone-deep certainty that this beautiful man loves me stills something deep inside me that’s been on a hamster wheel chasing an elusive goal since I was born.

The goal of unconditional, pure love.

My eyes go damp. “You were so good up there,” I whisper.

“We’ve had a lot of practice,” he murmurs back.

“Thiswasplanned.”