Page 57 of Ruck Me Harder

I can’t hide my smile as I kiss him. “So you don’t want to go to a sex shop together?”

Tony chokes.

“We can look into toys we can use on each other. Maybe some flavored lube?”

“Whatever you want,” he says, his voice strangled.

“Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?” I tilt my head as I study him. With how enthusiastic he’s been thus far, I didn’t peg him as a prude.

Mm. Pegging. I’d love to peg him. I’ve never done it before, but like they say, there’s a first time for everything.

“I didn’t think you’d be interested in toys,” he says. “Most women…” He winces, as if he’s recognizing that bring up whatever past he has with whoever they were might not be what I want to hear.

I have a past. So does he. I don’t care about his history or who he’s been with as long as he’s not with anyone else now.

“I’m not them. Our sex life is between us and nobody else.” Running my hand through his hair, he arches into my touch. “If you don’t want to play with toys, we don’t have to. But it could be fun.”

He swallows loudly, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat. Fuck. Why is that so hot?

“Maybe… we can look online? Especially not with the recent media attention, I don’t know that I’m ready to step foot in a store.”

“It’s a date.” I peck him on the lips.

He doesn’t let me get far, kissing me again. His tongue licks into my mouth, teasing mine. He tastes like strawberries with an undercurrent of his unique flavor. I can’t get enough of him.

His phone alarm slices through the air, puncturing the moment. With a sigh, he slips away, giving me one last kiss before he pulls back. I watch the muscles in his bare back flex as he retreats to my bedroom, returning a few moments later dressed in his clothes. If I had it my way, he’d be naked all the time.

“I’m at the shelter this afternoon,” he says, then stops.

I wait for him to continue. He doesn’t.

“Do you want to do something after?” I ask.

He swallows. “Maybe… you could come over to my place? My siblings will be home, Al doesn’t have a game and Cari’s always there, but maybe…”

“I’d love to.”

I want his siblings to like me. I’m fairly certain Cari does, she can’t stop beaming at me every chance she gets, and I think I won Al over that night at the bar. But being a friendly acquaintance in public is different from being their brother’s girlfriend. If we keep hiding away in my apartment and never going out or being around other people, we run the risk of this imploding before it ever really gets started.

It’s easy to put on a mask and pretend. It’s harder to be real with people watching. If this isn’t going to work out, if I’m too much for him, I’d rather find out sooner rather than later.

He says he’s not going anywhere. He says I’m worth it. But what if he changes his mind? I want to trust him, I really do. I just don’t know how to.

twenty-four

. . .

Tony

This is it. Do or die.

Standing at the top of the ramp, I stare at the vault sixty feet away. I can do this. I’ve been training like crazy for the past few months, getting ready for this. It all comes down to this one, singular moment.

Hopping into a run, I sprint down the ramp toward the table. After a round-off onto the springboard and a back handspring onto the table, I stretch my body into the layout position as I twist three and a half times. Focusing on my breathing, I keep my eyes on my spot, letting physics do its thing while I twist.

The landing comes out of nowhere. I’m not prepared for my feet to crash into the mat. I brace my knees and dig my toes in, sticking the landing by the skin of my teeth.

I did it. I landed the vault.