Page 64 of Body Check

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I shouldn’t have asked you to⁠—”

“You should have,” I tell him. “It’s fine. I know the deal. Until we’re ready to go public, this is for the best.”

He collapses onto the bed beside me. “Yeah, but it makes me feel shitty. Like I’m keeping you my dirty little secret.”

“I mean, technically…”

Lifting his head, he stares at me.

Laughing, I run my hand through his hair. “But it doesn’t bother me. Not when the alternative makes me break out in hives.”

He arches a brow. “Hives, huh? I don’t see any hives.”

“Better look closer, then.”

Rolling my body under his, he dips his head to kiss me. Every time he kisses me, it’s like fireworks going off deep in my belly.

Last night, he went to the bar with some of the guys, and I went to dinner with Ty and Brandon. I haven’t spent as much time with them lately. It was the first night Jason and I spent apart in Boston in the two and a half weeks we’ve been together. I missed his stupid face, going to bed with him beside me, and waking up snuggled next to him.

So instead, I waited until he got home, stripped naked, and gave him a show. For old time’s sake.

Except this time, he called me, and I heard the noises he made while he jacked himself off, the groans I’d love to swallow down. The same way I’ve swallowed other things down.

Now, his hard cock digs into my hip, but he makes no move to get me naked. He seems satisfied to make out, kissing simply for the sake of kissing. It doesn’t always have to be a race to see who can get naked first. It’s simply how it usually turns out.

It’s been a long time since I indulged in a man’s company. When I was pregnant, I didn’t want anyone to touch me, and before that, I was on such intense hormones preparing for the IVF, transfer, and the first twelve weeks… I didn’t want to risk any accidents.

Colorado was lonely. This career isn’t for the faint of heart, and after a while, the travel got to me. I didn’t have the strong friendships there that I’ve found now. I didn’t have any allies who would spend time with me. Whenever the team flew in to a new city, I found a guy in a bar or an app, but it was all so… impersonal. Get right down to business and then get out, never hearing from them again.

I missed having a connection. I missed wanting a connection.

But with Jason… I have one. Our connection goes beyond our bedroom activities. I enjoy spending time with him, talking about our days, dissecting the latest team gossip. I like him.

Maybe we’re rushing into things, spending so much time together. It must be the honeymoon period, right?

He’s only been divorced for a few months. But I’m not looking for a ring. I’m not even looking for a future. All I’m thinking about is right now, and how perfect this is. Would it be nice if the team knew? Sure, it would. Would it be nice to not have to worry about my job? Yes, definitely.

But if it risks this fragile new relationship, I’d rather keep it quiet until we’re more settled. Jason means too much to me to risk telling anyone.

I don’t want to give him up. Not now, maybe not ever.