Page 131 of Worth the Risk

“She left. Can’t fight for someone who didn’t stay.”

He mutters something under his breath, and I’m pretty sure he was calling me something. “Of course she left. I didn’t see you fighting for her. Did you ask her to stay?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“It’s complicated.” I move my arm just enough that I can peek up at him. He’s standing over me, hands on his hips, and that look that says, “I’m the chief of police, you’ll do as I say,” written all over him.

“That’s a bullshit excuse. Most of the time, life is complicated. Life is putting yourself on the line and taking your chances.”

I snort. “Been there. Done that. Been burned.”

“That was eight years ago. Don’t you think you’ve changed? Matured? Grown into a better man? Don’t you think you deserve a second shot at happiness? I think you do.” He sighs and shakes his head. “Look, it’s honorable that you try to be all Luke needs, but someday, he’s going to grow up, move out, have a life of his own . . . then where will you be? Alone.”

“Dad . . .”

“Stop wasting your chances. We’re all afraid of things. Hell, after all these years, I’m still afraid of your mom’s cooking some nights,” he says and smiles. “I still brave it because she’s worth the risk.”

Worth the risk. There’s that damn phrase again.

“That was supposed to make you smile, Grayson.”

“Thanks for the pep talk, Dad, but I’m just trying to figure things out.”

“You’ve already figured them out. Now you need to act on them.”

“Easier said than done.”

He holds a hand out to me. We hook thumbs, and he helps pull me up.

“Remember this—someone who really loves you sees what a mess you are and understands that you can be a moody son of a bitch but wants you anyway.”

“What’s your point?”

“I believe Sidney saw all that in you and still wants you. She just isn’t sure how to fight for someone when they refuse to see the same in themselves.”

Christ.

“It isn’t that easy.”

“A long time ago, someone once told me to find what I love and let it kill me.” He lowers his head for a moment before looking back up and meeting my eyes. “It’s okay if Sidney ruins you, Gray. Don’t be afraid of it, because she may also be the one to help bring you back to life. She may just be the air you need to breathe, the one you can’t live without.”

My dad holds my gaze and nods ever so slightly before he turns and walks back to wherever he came from.

I run a hand through my hair and know he’s right. About all of it. I’ve felt like shit the past few days. It’s more than just my missing her. It’s knowing I want her and somehow let her slip through my fingers.

It’s knowing she is the one risk I want to take, consequences be damned.

It’s knowing I was too damn scared to ask her to stay . . . and now that she’s gone, the answers are all clear as fucking day.

“I’m proud of you, Sid. Your work and dedication really had a chance to shine in this contest.”

“Thank you.” My words are muted, my mind elsewhere as I meet my dad’s gaze. He can probably see the confession of everything I did wrong.

Like fall in love with a contestant.

I clear my throat. “Numbers have definitely improved, and not just for the contest pages. The click-through to other articles has had a significant increase as well.”