Page 76 of The Backup Plan

Suddenly fear washes over me. He’s too close. Too there. Too male.

Fuck.

“Never thought you couldn’t, but my momma taught me to always treat the lady.”

I feel his large hand on the small of my back trying to playfully pull me toward him.

I taste the bitterness in my wine that wasn’t there with the last glass.

Because he put something in it when the woman passed me my purse.

Why can’t I form the words I want to say? Why does my head feel so heavy . . . so confused?

“Miss?” he asks. “Are you okay?”

The gentle voice of the man before me yanks me out of the memory.

“Yes. I’m sorry.” I shake my head and offer an apologetic smile despite my racing pulse. “Thank you, but I’m good.” His face falls and for a second I see how much courage it took for him to come up and ask me. “Any other time, the answer would be yes,” I say as to not discourage him from asking someone else. “Just out with friends tonight.”

His smile brightens. “Okay. Thank you.” He nods and then melts back into the crowd without pushing me again.

But my heart is still pounding, and my head is completely messed up. What if Lucas hadn’t gone in that bar on that night?

“Emery? You okay?” Mona asks. “You jumped like you’d seen a ghost when he asked if he could buy you a drink.”

“I’m fine. I didn’t see him there is all,” I say as an excuse and swallow down the unease the situation brought with it.

But as I take a sip of my wine, something clicks into place.

I have never felt that unease with Lucas. Not once.

Not when he stands too close. Not when he teases me. Not when his hand is on my lower back or when he looks at me too long.

With him, there’s a space even when there isn’t a distance, which feels like a protection that simply slipped into our friendship. A safety he gives me that he’s never demanded credit for.

Isn’t that why I keep looking at the door? Because what I felt just now—that panic, that unease—I’ve never felt that with Lucas.

And that matters more than I want it to. It matters just as much as the funny feeling that flips in my gut when he smiles at me.

I finish my drink and make my excuses that I need to finish some work at home but how appreciative I am for the invite. “We’ll definitely have to do it again,” I say before I leave.

But I welcome the quiet of home so much more. And when I walk down the hall to my place, I stop outside his door, and before I can talk myself out of it, I knock.

He opens the door, a surprised look on his face. “Hey,” falling from his lips when he sees me there.

And my heart does the thing it always does when I see him—stumbles a little before righting itself.

It’s just being ridiculous, but so is my smile, soft and unguarded. “Hi.” I scrunch my nose and suddenly feel like an idiot for what I had planned to say. I improvise. “I—uh—just wanted to say congrats on being cleared for full contact.”

“It’s all because of my great doctor who’s a physical therapist who’s a friend who has no problem calling me on my shit when needed and pushing me harder when that’s also needed.”

“I didn’t do anything.” I smile. This is even ground for me. It’s so much easier to talk about this than what I’d planned on saying when I knocked. “You’ve put in a lot of hard work, and it’s paid off. Now we just need to keep it strong and protected.”

“I trust you,” he says without hesitation and the words strike me in a way I’ve never experienced before.

“Thank you.” That’s all I say, all I can think to say, as I shift my feet and the silence stretches.

“Was there something else?”