Page 128 of Hard Pass

“Frank,” my mom says, almost like a warning.

I imagine her shooing him away and I smile. “Listen, kiddo . . . rules matter. They do. But sometimes life gets messy when something—or someone—matters enough. Doesn’t make you a bad person. It just makes you human.”

I bite my bottom lip to prevent the huge hiccupping sob I feel welling up.

“Just make sure that whatever comes next,” he says, “is something you can still respect yourself for when the noise dies down.”

And that’s why he’s always been my rock. His steady wisdom. His moral center. His guidance instead of judgment.

“I will,” I say quietly.

“And, sweetheart?” my mom says.

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to sound so scared with us. We’ll always have your back.”

“Always.”

So much so that when we hang up a few seconds later and the refresh buttons shows me the article has finally dropped, I’m able click on the link with a little more solid footing beneath me.

Besides, it’s not like ignoring it will make it go away.

For thirty seconds, I just stare at the headline, curiosity and dread warring inside of me over what comes next.

GRIDIRON INTEGRITY ANALYTICS INVESTIGATOR LINKED ROMANTICALLY TO COLE VALOR AMID GAMBLING PROBE

My stomach turns.

Linked romantically.

Such a polite way to say “fucked.”

I scroll before I can talk myself out of it.

Multiple sources confirm that Dublin Locke, lead investigator for Gridiron Integrity Analytics, has been personally involved with Valor during the active inquiry into suspicious betting activity surrounding his recent performance.

My throat tightens. Multiple sources, my ass.

Like I’m not a person. Like Cole isn’t a person.

Like whatever happened between us can be reduced to anonymous confirmation and ugly implication.

I keep reading.

The revelation raises questions about whether Locke’s findings can be considered impartial, particularly as sources close to the matter say it appeared she was preparing a recommendation favorable to Valor before all betting links had been fully resolved.

I stop breathing.

That isn’t technically wrong and that’s the problem. It’s close enough to the truth to make denying it sound desperate.

It had to be the offsite facility. A camera in the room? An employee who stopped by unannounced? A janitor for God’s sake? Because that’s when I told Cole I believed him. That’s when he kissed me before leaving.

“Fuck,” I groan.

My fingers shake as I scroll.

This is not the first time Locke’s judgment has faced scrutiny. Several years ago, she was involved in the controversial Murdoch investigation, a case that ended with Gridiron Integrity Analytics facing scathing criticism over procedural handling after questions were raised regarding improper relations between Locke and Murdoch himself. As of this date though, no accusations were substantiated.