Page 13 of Only Time Will Tell

“I’m not sure, but I can feel it in my bones. He was on the verge of uncovering something big, which he may have located before his heart gave out.” He flipped the omelet in the pan. “Pour me a cup of coffee, too, please.”

“But that still doesn’t explain why his body was found in the park.” My fear of this turning into something as unhealthy for Charlie as it had for his father left me with an uneasy feeling.

“True, there aren’t any hidden gems there.” He turned off the burners and plated our food.

I fixed our coffee, just the way we both liked it and joined him at the table. I never took the ease of our relationship for granted. One cooked, the other washed dishes, or we did both together. I’d offered to take turns making the meals, but Charlie found solace in cooking. For the most part, we shared the household chores since fighting over frivolous nonsense wasn’t an option for us. Nothing was worth risking what we had.

But the following Monday, our domestic bliss hit its first speed bump.

As of late, I’ve had to go into the Seattle office for a couple of in-person client meetings. Between that and Charlie going back to work, at least, I hoped that’s where he’d been off to, we saw less and less of each other.

Each time our paths crossed, he was exhausted. His clothes were a mess and honestly, so was he. I begged him to take a break and relax, but he wouldn’t listen. His mannerisms were erratic, and he frantically ran around waving his arms and carrying on unintelligible conversations with himself. He would walk right by me without acknowledging my presence, taking off to God knew where for hours on end, and crawling into bed late at night. My heart was breaking. What else was there to think other than he’d found someone else.

Our sex life had become non-existent, and Charlie wasn’t one to go days without it. The nights no longer belonged to us. I’d go to bed alone and wake up the same way. I knew he came home at some point, based upon certain items that were moved around the house.

After several weeks of this, it affected my sleep and in return, performance at work. I’d been called into a one-on-one meeting with my boss, and we agreed it was in my best interest to take an extended leave of absence. I didn’t go into details with him, just left it at my partner wasn’t handling the loss well. With Charlie’s and my paths no longer crossing, the only way to resolve whatever this was, was to confront him. With this time off it allowed me to basically stalk my own home twenty-four-seven now and figure this out. If it meant seeking help for Charlie, then so be it. His mental and physical well-being were what mattered most to me.

It was mid-afternoon on a Wednesday when the sound of metal hitting the wood floor drew my attention. Out of the office and down the stairs I went and found Charlie picking up a coppery artifact from the floor, animatedly cursing himself. I watched him for a few moments as he agitatedly paced back and forth in front of the fireplace, tugging at his hair. The pocket watch dangled between the fingers of his right hand. His behavior unnerved me, scared the ever-loving fuck out of me, to be honest. He repeatedly yelled, “Why did he do that?”

I couldn’t take it anymore, I stalked across the room, grabbed him by the shoulders, and shook him. “Charlie?” I asked but received no response. It was as though he was in a trance. “Charlie!” I yelled, but he kept mumbling. I was losing him, he was succumbing to the voices in his head, and I feared a padded cell would be his next stop. I shook him with all my might, shouting at the top of my lungs, “Charlie!”

He stopped, his eyes darted left and right, unable to focus. Those beautiful blues were devoid of all emotion, like the light behind them had diminished. “Charlie, my love, come back to me.” I pulled him to my chest and lost it, bawling uncontrollably. “Please.”

“Alex?” He whispered.

“I’m here, baby. What’s happening to you?” Tears streamed down my face.

Once he regained focus, the reality of whatever had taken place hit him. “Oh, Alex. What have I done?”

Those words were not what I wanted to hear, and the anger I’d cast aside in order to comfort him hit me. I pushed away, holding him at arm’s length, dreading the answer to the question I was about to ask. “Who is he, Charlie?”

“Who’s who?” he mumbled.

I moved away. Containing my emotions was proving to be a challenge. “You know who, Charlie. Who’s your lover? Your dealer? Or is he both?”

“What are you talking about?” That question was enough to bring him around.

“Look at you.” I gestured to his unkempt appearance, the dark circles under his eyes, the grayish tone his skin had taken on. “You’re gone for days on end. You look like you’re coming off a major bender. Are you fucking someone else?”

“Fucking who, Alex? You’re the only one I fuck,” he shouted back.

“You haven’t fucked me in weeks! Are you doing drugs?” My fists were balled at my sides, and I was on the verge of a total meltdown.

“I don’t do drugs, Alex. You know that, and I also don’t fuck around. It pisses me off that you would think I would.” Charlie distractedly fiddled with the watch again.

“You’ve lost all grip on reality. You’re never home, so I know something’s up. I’ve never ever lied to you, Charlie, and as far as I know you’ve never lied to me. Remember me? The man you supposedly love and promised to be faithful to.” Anger overcame me like it never had before. All rational thoughts were gone, and I was already running through my mind what I needed to pack before I left. I refused to stand by and watch the life we’d built together fall apart at the hands of another man.

“Alex, I do love you. You know that. I’m not fucking around. I’m not doing drugs. I’m following some of the leads I found in my dad’s journals.” Arms extended as he came toward me.

I fell back on the couch, out of his reach, and buried my face in my hands, crying like I’d never cried before. Charlie sat beside me and rubbed my back. I wanted to pull away, but it seemed I needed his touch more than my anger.

“I’m sorry, Alex, I never meant to hurt you. I should’ve told you what I was doing, but it took me by surprise and once it happened, I couldn’t stop following it.”

“What in the fuck are you talking about, Charlie?” I dropped my hands and sat back, knocking him away. When I glanced up he was twisting the pocket watch in his hands again.

He stood and went right back to pacing. “This,” he said, pointing to the pocket watch. “This is the key to all my father accomplished. His leads, his travels, his journals – they all revolve around this watch.”

“You’re not making any sense. Look at you, Charlie,” I said, eyeing him up and down. “When’s the last time you’ve showered? Eaten? Even looked in the mirror?”