Page 1 of Daddy’s Little Secret

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“Daddy, do we have to go back to Phoenix?” It was awesome up here, far away from the closet I was in down south. Here, Daddy didn’t hide who I was to him, or what we were to each other. We had our own house and everything. Down south, he had his apartment and I had my room at Grandma’s…

Plus, up here I got to be me.

“I’m afraid so, Angel. Daddy and Uncle Chuck have a meeting with a new client tomorrow and it’s in the office. You can play with Tae in his playroom while we meet. Won’t that be fun?”

“But-but, I like it up here. It’s just you and me, and when we have to go into town, everyone is so nice to us.” And I’m afraid that back in Phoenix I’ll just be Daddy’s employee. Again.

Daddy kept our relationship hidden for like, forever, until Uncle Chuck said something to him. Then whoosh! Everything changed. He encouraged my Little to play with Tae and even kissed me in front of them. But my gut was telling me when we headed back to Phoenix, I’d be his secret again.

I didn’t like that.

It made me sad, and that felt like I didn’t matter.

“Angel,” Daddy knelt in front of me, “what’s really going on inside that handsome head of yours?” I didn’t look up, didn’t want to see the disappointment in his eyes. Daddy took the toys from my hand and set them aside then tipped my chin to face him. “Talk to me, Trey.”

No cute Angel nickname, just my real name. Not. Great.

“I don’t want to be your dirty little secret anymore.”

“Wow.” Daddy lost his balance and fell back on his butt. “Direct hit and not undeserved. Come here.” Daddy patted his lap, and I crawled over and sat on it. “I’ve been a bad Daddy.” I shook my head. “Yes, Trey, I have. Daddy has a lot of making up to do, but I can promise you one thing.”

“What’s that?” Daddy gave me a super-sweet kiss that made my tummy all swirly.

“Daddy will never put you back in that nasty closet again. You never should’ve been there in the first place. This weekend, we’ll move all your stuff from your grandma’s house to Daddy’s place.”

“Really, Daddy?” We’d kinda been living together since Samian left for college, but nothing was made official and I hardly had anything at his place.

“Really. No more hiding you, no more hiding us. You’re my boy, my partner for life, and I love you. I hope you know that.” Daddy’s eyes got all sad. I didn’t like it when Daddy was sad or hurt.

I’d been in love with this man since the first time I met him. I was still in high school, two grades ahead of Tae. I applied for a job through the school program I was in for a part-time laborer my senior year with Ashwood Handyman Services. Uncle Chuck was the one who interviewed me. The first jobsite he sent me to was to help Daddy out. We worked so well together that Uncle Chuck made us a team, and as soon as I graduated, a full-time employee.

Watching how Daddy was with his brothers, raising them like his own, only made me love him more. They may not have had a lot, but what they had a lot of was love. He went without more times than I could count just to make sure Tae and Samian had what they needed. He’d always put himself and his needs last, and now that he could focus on his own life, he was lost.

And that was why Daddy needed me.

I’d be Daddy’s big boy. “It’s okay, Daddy.”

“No, Angel, it’s not. You were there all along, helping Daddy, and now it’s time for Daddy to take proper care of his boy. You’ve never been second to me, Trey. I was just so overwhelmed I never saw past what had to happen right in that very moment.” Daddy rubbed his hand up and down my back, and I sank into the soothing feeling.

“Daddy had a lot to do.”

“Yes, and now those days are behind us, and my main focus is you and proving to you that I’m worthy of your love. I don’t expect you to believe that, but I need you to do something for me.”

“What’s that?”

“You need to call me out when I’m wrong. You’ve taken a lot over the years when you shouldn’t have. You tell Daddy when there’s something you don’t like. This is a relationship. I should’ve admitted that a long time ago and made things right. I was a fool, Angel.”

“No, Daddy.” I snuggled in tighter. “Tae and Samian were kids and they needed you. You did what was right by them.”

“And now it’s time for me to do right by you.”

Right by me was Daddy milky time. “Daddy, suckie?” We’d spent the morning cleaning up and packing, and I was worn out. “Nappy?” My Little was done being a big boy.

“Yes, my sweet boy worked hard this morning helping Daddy. He can have his suckies and a nap. Then, we have to head back to Phoenix.” I sighed. “I know, but we may be up here more often. Fingers crossed tomorrow’s meeting goes well.”

That sounded promising, but I didn’t want to get my hopes up. I’d been hurt before by broken promises, though I did my best not to let on.