Page 139 of Secrets on Ice

She takes a breath. “I hooked up with Nelly at the gala.”

I sit up so fast I nearly spill my wine. “You what?”

“It’s just, he looked really good in the tux, and there was champagne, and you were right, I was jealous. Then I remembered the girls mentioned hanky panky in a hotel room, so I kind of booked a room and …”

I burst out laughing.

“Shut up.” But she’s smiling, too, into her glass. “It was supposed to be over. That was the deal.”

“And?”

“And apparently the deal is very flexible when he’s in a tux.” She groans and covers her face. “It was so good, Em. That’s the problem. It’s never not good with him. And now I don’t know what to do.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

She’s quiet for a second, watching the fire. “I don’t know,” she says honestly. “Maybe. We said no strings, we said just fun, and it’s starting to not feel like just fun, and that scares me.” She glances at me. “Feelings ruin everything.”

I laugh, because she has no idea. I’m the last person on earth who should be giving anyone advice about tangled-up feelings with a man you’re not supposed to have them for.

“Don’t overthink it. You just got out of a long marriage. Do you really want to jump back into another relationship?”

“No, but I like having sex with him.”

“Then I guess you have to weigh that up, sex or feelings?”

“Dammit, when did you get so wise?” She smirks.

“No idea.” I laugh.

We sit there in the firelight with the snow coming down, two women in way over our heads with two men we keep telling ourselves don’t mean anything, and neither of us says the obvious thing.

That we’re both lying to ourselves.

38

EMBER

It’s late on Christmas Eve, and the apartment is quiet after having Christmas Eve dinner with Emmett, Jo, Collette, and Fish. Cassidy is asleep down the hall, as are her parents in the guest bedroom, while Mom is staying with my brother. I’m curled up in my flannel pajamas half-watching a Christmas movie when I hear a tentative knock n my door.

I know it’s him before he opens it. Sully. He pops his head through the doorway to see if I’m awake.

“Come in,” I whisper, because his parents are just there.

He walks in wearing his matching flannel pajamas that Cassidy and I decided to do, and he had no choice, with his hands behind his back and a look of pure mischief on his face.

“I’m glad you’re still up. I wanted to give you something without an audience,” he says.

I’m surprised. “I got you something too.”

His face lights up. “You did?”

I nod. “Yeah, it’s in my bag, let me get it.” I scurry out of bed, walk into my closet, and pull the package out of its hiding spot.

“Should we swap at the same time?” he asks.

“Yes.”

“Okay, 1… 2 … 3…”