Page 88 of Secrets on Ice

Istare at him, heart hammering so hard I can feel it in my throat.

Sully is still between my legs, fingers glistening with me, eyes dark and hungry as he slowly licks them clean. The sight is so filthy, so raw, that my pussy clenches again like it’s begging for more.

I’m shocked.

I’m turned on.

I’m so fucking confused.

I just came harder than I ever have in my life, on my brother’s best friend’s hand, in the middle of the kitchen, while my best friend could walk in at any moment. And instead of feeling guilty … I feel alive.

Sully’s voice is low, rough. “I hope you don’t regret this.”

I shake my head quickly. “What? Why would you …” Of course he would think that after what happened in Maine. “No. Never.”

His eyes soften for a second, but the heat is still there. He leans in, brushing his lips against mine in a slow, sensual kiss that makes my toes curl.

“Do you want more?” he murmurs against my mouth.

I hesitate, breath shaky. “I … I don’t know.”

He pulls back just enough to look at me, thumb stroking my bottom lip. His cock is rock hard, straining against pajama pants, and I can’t stop my eyes from dropping to it. The outline is thick, obvious, and the sight makes my core throb again.

I swallow hard. “Do you … need help with that?”

A low, amused sound rumbles in his chest. “No, I can rub one out in my bed. But thank you for offering.” He steps back, but not before his eyes drag down my body, lingering between my legs where I’m still exposed and wet. “You don’t wear underwear to bed?” he asks, voice dropping.

My cheeks burn. “Um … no, they annoy me.”

He lets out a rough breath, running a hand through his hair. “You’re killing me. Now that I know this, I don’t know if I can un-know it.”

The words hang between us, heavy and sweet and so full of want. He looks at me for a long moment, eyes soft but burning. “I’m just going to say it. Em, if you want this again, any time, day or night, you know where my room is.”

I stare at him in surprise.

Then he turns and walks away, leaving me sitting on the counter, legs still trembling, heart racing.

I barely sleep that night. Every time I close my eyes, I feel his fingers inside me, hear his filthy words in my ear, see the way he looked at me like he wanted to devour me whole. My body is still buzzing, sensitive and aching in the best way.

At some point in the night, my mind drifts back to the first time we were together. I was seventeen and Kevin and I had broken up again. It was like the fourth time that year. I had just found out that he’d lost his virginity to Rachel Meyer, the girl that I hated more than anyone at that school. She had great pleasure in telling me that she took something from me, that I would never be Kevin’s first, that she would always have that over me. I was devastated, humiliated that he would do that to me. I always thought I was going to be his first. We had been waiting for so long, and then he just gave it away to her.

Cassidy took me back to her place for a sleepover, her parents were away for the weekend, so we had the place to ourselves. We had the best night singing and dancing and eating pizza and ice cream, but then she asked me if I would hate her if she went over and saw Trevor, who lived a couple of doors down from her. I was a little hurt, but it wasn’t her fault Kevin was a dick. So, I told her to go, someone needed to get laid.

I stayed there in the dark of the basement where we had set up for the sleepover, getting angrier. I couldn’t believe Kevin had done that to me, I thought he loved me. I thought he was the one. It wasn’t fair that he’d gone and slept with someone else, and I knew that in a week’s time he’d come crawling back to me like he always did, and I’d be the idiot who took him back. I’m done. Fuck you, Kevin. I was going to find someone so much better to lose my virginity to. That was when I realized Connor was home and he had helped me out last time.

Fuck you, Kevin.

So, before I lost my nerve, I rushed upstairs and found Connor’s room. The door was cracked open. I pushed it gently, heart pounding so hard I could hear it in my ears. He was lying on his bed in the dark, one arm behind his head, on his phone. When he saw me, he sat up fast, surprised.

“Em? What’s wrong?”

I closed the door behind me and leaned against it, trying to keep my voice steady.

“I want you to take my virginity.”

He stared at me, mouth open, completely shocked.

“What?”